French Kiss?

[Rían]

On another board, we were trying to come up with the Middle Earth version of "French Kiss", and I thought I'd bring it here, since it was a fun discussion

My vote was for Feanorean kiss, but here are some of the other candidates we had come up with:

Gondorian Kiss
Lebennin Kiss
Umbarian Kiss
Lossarnach Kiss
Cardolani Kiss
Pelargir Kiss
Belfalas Kiss
Valinorian Kiss

Any other ideas, or which is your favorite? (or is the term "French kiss" even used anymore?)

Oh, and here's an obscure reference I found in my version of the Sil:

from JRRT's "The Silmarillion", chapter 17 - "Of the Coming of Men into the West" - the bit where Finrod first discovers humans:

Long Felagund watched them, and love for them stirred in his heart, and pity, too, for they kissed like pecking chickens; but he remained hidden in the trees until they had all fallen asleep. Then he went among the sleeping people, and sat besides their dying fire where none kept watch; and he took up a rude harp which Beor had laid aside, and he played music upon it such as the ears of Men had not heard: for they had as yet no teacher in this art, nor in the art of kissing, save only the Dark Elves in the wild lands.

Now men awoke and listened to Felagund as he harped and sang, and each thought that he was in some fair dream, until he saw that his fellows were awake also beside him: but they did not speak or stir while Felagund still played, because of the beauty of the music and the wonder of the song wherein he described a strange and new way of kissing. Wisdom was in the words of the Elven-king, and the hearts grew wiser that hearkened to him: for the things of which he sang, of the marking of Arda, and the bliss of Aman beyond the shadows of the Sea, and the yumminess of Feanorean kissing, came as clear visions before their eyes, and his Elvish speech was interpreted in each mind according to its measure.

Thus it was that Men called King Felagund, who they first met of all the Eldar, Nom, that is Wisdom; and Lamba, that is Tongue, in the language of that people, and after him they named his folk Nomin, the Wise, and Lambengolmo, the Loremasters of the Tongue.

[Gwaimir Windgem]

I think you pencilled that into your version of the Sil; "yumminess" gave you away.

But on the question at hand: what people are famous for their skill in the art of love?

[brownjenkins]

Originally Posted by Gwaimir Windgem

But on the question at hand: what people are famous for their skill in the art of love?

Tolkien doesn't touch on that aspect much though, if I had to guess, I'd go with the Breelands, as they seem like the saucy type.

Bree Kissin'

And for any that need pointers.

[Rían]

Funny! Instructions on the internet for a French kiss

Well, as for Gwai's point - Tolkien doesn't comment on skill, but Finwe had two wives, which was very unusual, and Feanor had 7 kids, which was very unusual.

Originally Posted by Gwai

I think you pencilled that into your version of the Sil; "yumminess" gave you away.

and "pecking chickens" didn't?

[The Gaffer]

Originally Posted by brownjenkins

Bree Kissin'

And maybe coitus interruptus could be getting off at Bywater.

[Butterbeer]

I object!

yours, mary W

xx (oops!, cut off my tongue!)

[The Gaffer]

That would be Lobelia, Shirley..?

[Gwaimir Windgem]

Originally Posted by RÃ*an

Well, as for Gwai's point - Tolkien doesn't comment on skill, but Finwe had two wives, which was very unusual, and Feanor had 7 kids, which was very unusual.

Fair enough; I'll vote for Feanorean kiss.

and "pecking chickens" didn't?

'Yumminess' was more grossly contrary to Tolkien's writing style.

[Wayfarer]

In France, a French Kiss is just 'A Kiss With Tongue,' so miquë as-lambë would be the Quenya.

A) It seems like you're running out of thread topics around here.
B) I normally wouldn't have bothered, but my excuse is that I'm up late.
C) I still have a bunch of elvish translation sites memorized. Go me.
D) Yes, I have experience in translating risqué phrases to Quenya. I was 13. Leave me alone.

[Keith K]

It's difficult to say which folk rank first in frenching.

I would imagine that any solid Wood Elf would do just fine.

Then again, there are some very savvy folk down Rohan way. You know. Those cunning Eorlingas...

[Rían]

Oy! *headdesk*

[Beren3000]

How about Orcish kiss?
I guess it would make sense that:

Orcs like it dirty!

Hey, Rian Hope that wasn't too OT for you!
God, I miss hanging around here!