why do people cut themselves?

[HOBBIT]

Why do peopel cut themselves?

I've knwon a bunch of teens now around my age who have confided in me that they used to cut themselves! And they talk about it so casually too. Luckilly, they don't do it anymore, to my knowledge.


I'm just wondering: why would any sane person cut themselves with a knife or sharp object, inflicting wounds in one's self? It just seems stupid. It's mind boggling.


Anyone have any experience in this?

[Elfmaster XK]

A friend of mine does it because she is depressed and goes through stages of intense lethargy. Apparently the cutting helps her get out of that.

Another friend said that they did it when they were angry because they had seen someone else do it. Influences from other people can be very strong.

Depression makes you do weird things that make sense only to you. There's lots of reasons people have given, I used to do it and in my head it made sense, but I'm not going into that.

I wish I had more time then I could elaborate but I'm on a librabry computer.

[Starr Polish]

If you want to get really technical, cutting can trigger endorphin release in the brain, which can make someone feel better.

This is a heavy topic and I'm pretty cautious about talking about it, however.

I personally think the people on the internet that go around on the internet and constantly talk about cutting and even TAKE PICTURES and post them on the internet are looking for attention. Yes, they obviously have something wrong with them to cut in the first place, but when it gets to that point I lose most of my sympathy for them.

I'm not saying that all people who cut are like this, but I'm tired of seeing people compare self-inflicted wounds on the internet, or whining about how bad their middle-class life is.

[Insidious Rex]

Its true that cutting at one point in the late 90s really became something of a fashion statement with a certain sect of the teen populace (remember the song Strawberry Gashes? a true goth cult favorite). And some people did it just so they could say they did it too. which of course is disgustingly pitiful. but hey teenagers are followers at heart what can you do. never the less, pop culture aside, cutting is a symptom of a pathology. no doubt about it. often times its a way for someone who feels weak and helpless to find a center or some control in their life. even if they cant control all the crazy stuff going on around them they can at least cause themselves pain... sometimes its a way of reminding oneself that they are alive. what better way then raw pain to cut through the numbing deadness inflicted by a chaotic world. sometimes its a form of self punishment and a release at the same time. i hate myself. i just did something im really mad or embarrassed about. i need to cut to release this tension this feeling that im gonna explode. that kind of thing. theres more reasons too. and im pretty sure weve been through this before in a thread sminty started last year or something. look it up for more info.

[BeardofPants]

I used to cut myself. A lot of it due to the feeling of being helpless, and unable to fight against it. When I was a teen living at home, I went through a lot of shite, and cutting helped me deal with it. My mother was very emotionally controlling, and physically abusive, and self-inflicted harm felt like the only form of control I had over me. People never found out, cos I used to wear a plethora of bracelets over the scars.

[Elvellyn]

I know someone (a friend of mine since we were little girls) who cuts. I asked her the other day why she did it and she struggled to exlain it to me. She said it's like you hurt so much on the inside, that you want a tangible feeling (pain) to show for it. She also stressed that she does not consider herself a masochist; she doesn't enjoy it, just when you are cutting yourself, you aren't thinking about whatever is making you cut yourself. She's gone through some problems with her mom and I'm praying for her.

[Shelob's Hubby]

When you feel so bad inside for whatever stupid reason and you can't stop thinking about whatever you did, the only way to stop it is to feel pain.

[The last sane person]

Yeah, I used to do that quite a bit. I was in the same boat as Beard of Pants. I still do it occasionally, but no one has really noticed. Everyone thinks the scars are from my fights, as most of them are...I dunno, I guess I feel so bad on the indside, I want to have something to get it out. And it doesnt hurt me anymore, it actually gets rid of the hurt.

[Starr Polish]

IR, the cutting as a fad is still in full swing, it's just more noticeable in blogs/online journals now.

Some reasons I've heard to explain cutting:

To alleviate feeling numb. Sometimes you just shut down, and that can be scary, and cutting makes you realize you're alive.

A form of release. Sometimes it feels like you're letting problems out of yourself when you cut.

To make a place to focus emotional pain. It's a lot easier to pinpoint pain on your arm or leg because you cut there as opposed to some screwed up emotions people can have.

As a form of control, similar to why some people are anorexic or bulimic. Being control of your own pain can be comforting when you feel like everything else is beyond your control.

[Hanza]

i have friend who cut himself. i found out when i pulled up his sleeve once and saw the scars. that was one of the worst moments of my life. to known that ur best friend had been keeping this from you for so long. i cudnt believe i hadnt twigged before. hed always just said he had his reasons for not coming swimming with us and stuff. but he wudnt tel me. i cant believe it never crossed my mind. not once in six months. i felt like a bad friend. he doesnt cut nemore as far as i know. but its a sensitive subject and i have never been able to ask him why he did it. i wish i cud have known and helped him.

[Shelob's Hubby]

Originally Posted by Hanza

i wish i cud have known and helped him.

You should NOT blame yourself for anything you did/did not do. What a person who cuts needs most is a friend who will not care whether they cut themselves or not, and just do normal things with them. A cutter does not need all of their friends to turn into councelors. The best thing you can do is continue to be his friend and not treat him any differently than before you knew. You are probably much more scared to talk to him about it than he is. Continue to support him because it is easy to start cutting again after you stop.

[trolls' bane]

Cut theirselves? I've heard of it, but I find it easier to berid myself of depression by talking to myself or going on the internet.

[trolls' bane]

Oh, and forgot to mention that I especially enjoy scaring my fellow classmates into leaving me alone.

[Linaewen]

Originally Posted by BeardofPants

I used to cut myself. A lot of it due to the feeling of being helpless, and unable to fight against it. When I was a teen living at home, I went through a lot of shite, and cutting helped me deal with it. My mother was very emotionally controlling, and physically abusive, and self-inflicted harm felt like the only form of control I had over me. People never found out, cos I used to wear a plethora of bracelets over the scars.

I'm curious, BoP, what made you stop? If you don't mind me asking. Damn, what an awful childhood.

Luckily, I don't know anyone who cuts themselves. Or I don't know if they do.

[BeardofPants]

Me? I moved out of home when I was sixteen. My childhood sounds worse than it actually was.

[Hemel]

Starr Polish:
I'm not saying that all people who cut are like this, but I'm tired of seeing people compare self-inflicted wounds on the internet, or whining about how bad their middle-class life is.

Oh Gawd yes. Forgive me if I seem a little unsympathetic (and believe me, for anyone who truly does have proper depression I have every sympathy in the world) but, having suffered over the last couple of weeks from a self-centred teenage relative (from a nice home - better than most), whose entire conversation consists of how miserable and boring life is, and whose friends all would seem to have scars all over the place and whose problems consist merely of who has said what hurtful comment to whom and whether they can score or not, I do feel somewhat impatient about this.

I'm afraid my rather brusque response was - go and get a life! A few days working boats in the pouring winter rain'd soon sort 'em out ...

[Beruthiel's cat]

I work as the administrative assistant in a University mental health counseling center and this is one of the problems that is most often seen here. Not being a professional in the field, I can't offer any clinical reasons behind this behavior, but most of the students who come here with this problem are young (teens to early twenties), and suffering from depression. They are very secretive about the behavior and often come to counseling because they have become afraid of their behavior or because they were encouraged to do so by concerned friends.

I have seen both outgoing, active students come in because they are cutting, as well as introverted and shy young people, so this behavior doesn't seem to have a "typical" type of person that engages in it.

Counseling seems to help the majority of cutters, if, for no other reason than to help them understand the nature of their self-injurious behavior and to offer alternatives to help them cope with the feelings of depression and helplessness they feel. I hasten to add, however, that cutting is not a behavior that goes away overnight. It is the manifestation of many problems that must be worked out over time.

[Ñólendil]

Yeah, I used to do that quite a bit. I was in the same boat as Beard of Pants. I still do it occasionally, but no one has really noticed. Everyone thinks the scars are from my fights, as most of them are...I dunno, I guess I feel so bad on the indside, I want to have something to get it out. And it doesnt hurt me anymore, it actually gets rid of the hurt.

It doesn't seem like anyone picked up on this quote, a post from "The last sane person".

Tlsp, do you still cut? I never practiced cutting myself, but I have lived in a psychiatric hospital, and I have met many who did. I myself have suffered from severe depression and schizophrenia. I feel I know what that kind of pain is like, where you want to hurt yourself. For me, it was about death.

It DOES hurt you. It does not get rid of the hurt. It only leads to more pain, my friend. I have been trying to come up with encouraging remarks to give you, but it is difficult to come up with something that can really make a difference. I never know, if I am making a difference now, or if you will see the difference later, or if I will not be a factor. I hope I will not make things worse.

I don't know where you are coming from, so I don't know why you believe that it is taking away the pain. I know that cutting can feel good, initially. But it is like taking illegal drugs--for a while you can feel good, but it is very bad for your health. Eventually, you will feel the sting.

I met a very nice girl in the hospital, who was there for cutting. We went to "groups" in the hospital, meetings where the patients and staff-members would discuss issues we were going through. One day, when I was going to the hospital only part-time (as opposed to living there), the nice girl, who I had never spoken to, walked up to me at a soda machine.

"Excuse me," she said, "I just wanted to thank you for saving my life. You said something in group."

"What did I say?" I asked, astonished.

"You said 'I don't want to live. But I am choosing to live.' I hang on to that."

She's okay now, and so am I, and I am very grateful for that. Apparently, what I said really helped her. So I hope it can help you.

You want to cut. I hope you can understand, sooner or later, that cutting is hurting you. You don't have to cut. I know sometimes we can't control our desires. But you can control your actions. You can choose not to cut.

I think you also need to tell someone close to you, who you can trust, that you are still cutting. Perhaps, if it is possible, therapy is something you can pursue. I have benefited a lot from professional therapy. Getting through the pain is an effort you will have to make, but others can help.

[The last sane person]

What can I say? I am the ghost of entmoot. I really dont care anymore, and neither does anyone else. I dont have anyone close to me any more, the last one i had is 6 feet under. And I try to stay out of relationships as usually the other person dies. Ya ken?

And besides, I've been to therapy, nothing gained cept a juicey big bill. Hell, if I dont hurt myself, there is a long line of people who will gladly do it for me. All I am now is one mass of scars, what will one more do?

Too be quite frank, I was surprised by no ends to see this message. I've lived by the strength of my own will sometimes, and it isnt like I want to die. Jeez, if I wanted to die, I would just take the knife and go 2 centimeters down. I wouldnt give myself an additional 10 more years of suffering.

Y'know the reason I posted at all? Cause on the net, you can say anyhting you want and people arent going to really care or remember, so it is a way to vent and get it out without bothering with other people.

Look, sorry for sounding rude, I really dont mean to come off like that. Not my style at all, just that I am used to being detatched is all.

[Pirate]

I cut myself once because I felt I disserved the pain. I had a nervous breakdown type of thing and was all alone in the house. It was the stupidest, childish and immature thing I've ever down. I have trouble feeling sympathy for "cutters" because I think it's immature. Almost everyone I know cuts or has cut and when I cut myself I sunk to their level. The people I know cut because they broke up with their boyfriend or they're moving or mom doesn't shower them with attention 24-7. They want to be the victims in their own movie about their life. Not all people who cut may be like this I have yet to meet one who isn’t. With the whole "Goth" thing and movies like thirteen and there's even a book called cut about some poor victim girl who goes to counseling, cutting has become cool, it defines you as a person.
At least that's how I feel...