09-24-2005, 06:33 PM | #1 |
Hobbit
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Georgia
Posts: 23
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Dreams
Life seems as just a dream
Always wanting to scream And to finally be awake To no longer take The suffering of this state To come to what awaits To be what is real Even if the Devil's deal Is my only way To make my escape today To flee with the wind But to never mend From what life has brought From the death that was sought Escape dreams to live and fade No hope was ever made To carry life through Hell So in time I will fail
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09-24-2005, 06:40 PM | #2 |
Elf Lord
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Fountain Valley, CA
Posts: 6,343
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The meter could do with some fixing up, but it's nice that you've found words that neatly rhyme while bringing your meaning across. It is a rather depressing poem, though, don't you think? Rather grim?
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If the world has indeed, as I have said, been built of sorrow, it has been built by the hands of love, because in no other way could the soul of man, for whom the world was made, reach the full stature of its perfection. ~Oscar Wilde, written from prison Oscar Wilde's last words: "Either the wallpaper goes, or I do." |
09-24-2005, 07:21 PM | #3 |
of the House of Fëanor
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 6,150
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Ah, yeah... it IS tremendously depressing. Squirrel, are you O.K.? Your writing indicates a certain familiarity with suicidal tendencies which can come across as worrisome. It is a good poem, just seems supremely and even a bit cloyingly dark. Cheer up, little Squirrel!
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09-24-2005, 09:49 PM | #4 |
Hobbit
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Georgia
Posts: 23
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sorry guys... i only do depressing poetry
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09-24-2005, 09:51 PM | #5 |
Hobbit
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Georgia
Posts: 23
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oo and yea suicidal self-mutilation.... been there
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09-24-2005, 09:57 PM | #6 |
of the House of Fëanor
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 6,150
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There is a thread around here somewhere called "why do people cut themselves," it's a good one to check out! It's one of the first threads I ever posted in, actually, now that I think of it.
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Few people have the imagination for reality.
~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe |
09-24-2005, 10:03 PM | #7 |
Hobbit in the Music
Join Date: Nov 1999
Location: Westmarch
Posts: 1,111
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It does call to mind Hamlet's "to be or not to be" speech...
"for in that sleep of death what dreams may come" |
09-25-2005, 12:07 AM | #8 |
Hobbit
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Georgia
Posts: 23
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thats ok... I know why I did it besides its been about a month since I last tried anything
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09-25-2005, 01:19 AM | #9 |
of the House of Fëanor
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 6,150
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I'm tellin' ya, squirrel, go under "search," and type in "why do people cut themselves" and you will find that thread. it's something I think you might like to read, & post in. Like I said, it was one of the first threads here that I ever posted in!
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Few people have the imagination for reality.
~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe |
09-25-2005, 11:09 AM | #10 |
Hobbit
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Georgia
Posts: 23
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Ii dont cut myself anymore..... my bf was upset to the point that I quit
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