11-09-2004, 11:08 PM | #1 |
The Infamous Tea Hobbit
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Riding my Attack Llama, CORY!
Posts: 1,162
|
Ask Snape Column
Okay, I saw this game on another Harry potter sight and it was hilarious, so I thought I would bring it here and see how it goes since I know there's a good HP following going on here.
Anywho, the idea is students or other HP people write to snape and snape answers, so the first post would be such, "Prof. Snape, I lost my homework. Neville." (well, be more creative than that, lol) And then the next person posts Snape's reply and a new question for Snape. See? So it goes like this, Person 1: Prof. Snape Lost my homework, Neville Person 2: Neville, 50 points from Gryffindor, Prof. Snape ------------------------ Prof. Snape URA Ugly Git Signed, Not Fred and George. See? Quite fun, really. Anywho, I'll start the first one and then the next person pick it up with Snape's reply and another question. Dear Professor Snape, I don't understand this P I got on my Potions final. I got every question right, sir! I can't get an P! You got it wrong, man! I do not get P's! Please change this grade. Hermione Granger
__________________
If I can stop one heart from aching, I shall not live in vain. -Emily Dickinson But the Master comes, and the foolish crowd Never can quite understand The worth of a soul and the change that is wrought By the touch of the Master's hand. Though she be but little, she is fierce! -MSND |
11-10-2004, 06:24 AM | #2 | |
Elven Warrior
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 345
|
Quote:
-So eh, snape, another year in er potions? Just cant' get tha DADA job can ya? -Rubeus Hagrid
__________________
"The first rule about Fight Club, You don't talk about Fight Club." |
|
11-10-2004, 07:11 AM | #3 | |
Fëanorophobic
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Between the pages of a book
Posts: 1,417
|
Hey, fun game!
Next morning, Hagrid found this anonymous note in his cottage: "Go kiss a Hippogriff you
Hyia Snapey, I've known you for the last 5 years and I can't help it anymore: I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU! So if you're interested in a date, meet me in the Slytherin common room at midnight. What do you say, muffin? Secret admirer |
|
11-10-2004, 08:31 AM | #4 | ||
Co-President of Entmoot
Super Moderator Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Canada
Posts: 8,397
|
Dear Fred and George,
You'd be surprised what you can use potions for, such as revealing the sender of an "anonymous" note. Maybe you can use one of your Puking Pastilles to get rid of the rash. Professor Snape Dear Professor Snape, It is inappropriate to hex, poison, or cast any harmful spells on students. Fred and George are now recovered. Minerva MacGonagall Hey Harry, Would you believe what that evil git Snape did to us!? If you want to join us in a prank meet us in the Astronomy tower tonight after dinner. F&G
__________________
"I can add some more, if you'd like it. Calling your Chief Names, Wishing to Punch his Pimply Face, and Thinking you Shirriffs look a lot of Tom-fools." - Sam Gamgee, p. 340, Return of the King Quote:
Quote:
|
||
11-10-2004, 12:46 PM | #5 | |
Warrior of the House of Hador
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 4,651
|
I thought we were only meant to do the one replying to the one above and one new letter! Oh well!
Quote:
Great anything to annoy that evil git. Harry. Dear Mr. Filch Mrs Norris has been murdered To collect her corpse please come to my office. Prof Macgonagall
__________________
Then Huor spoke and said: "Yet if it stands but a little while, then out of your house shall come the hope of Elves and Men. This I say to you, lord, with the eyes of death: though we part here for ever, and I shall not look on your white walls again, from you and me a new star shall arise. Farewell!" The Silmarillion, Nirnaeth Arnoediad, Page 230 |
|
11-10-2004, 10:29 PM | #6 |
The Infamous Tea Hobbit
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Riding my Attack Llama, CORY!
Posts: 1,162
|
This is great! I'm so glad some people have posted. Bleh, I would feel so stupid if nothing happened and I had to listen to the crickets.
A couple things. 1, the posts should all have 2 parts, one from snape and one to snape. person 1: Dear Fred and George, Next time don't use your own scribbly handwriting when you write me love notes. 10 points from Gryffindor. Snape ================= Snape, You forgot the vodka at the DE meeting, don't let it happen again!! Wormtail Ok, so the next person would reply to wormtail and then present a new question for snape. see? no more or less than 2 messages a post. Problem 2, its only supposed to be for snapey-poo, sorry Nurv, dear. Alrighty, enough of sounding like a rule-maker rather than a rule-breaker! LETS PARTY. The next person can reply to the wormtail comment
__________________
If I can stop one heart from aching, I shall not live in vain. -Emily Dickinson But the Master comes, and the foolish crowd Never can quite understand The worth of a soul and the change that is wrought By the touch of the Master's hand. Though she be but little, she is fierce! -MSND |
11-11-2004, 05:23 AM | #7 |
Elven Warrior
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 345
|
oh so there is a rulebook for this game
__________________
"The first rule about Fight Club, You don't talk about Fight Club." |
11-11-2004, 05:44 PM | #8 | ||
Co-President of Entmoot
Super Moderator Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: Canada
Posts: 8,397
|
Now I'm confused. But the first two letters in my post work right?
__________________
"I can add some more, if you'd like it. Calling your Chief Names, Wishing to Punch his Pimply Face, and Thinking you Shirriffs look a lot of Tom-fools." - Sam Gamgee, p. 340, Return of the King Quote:
Quote:
|
||
11-11-2004, 05:50 PM | #9 | |
Warrior of the House of Hador
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 4,651
|
Quote:
Snape Snape, I think Mrs. Norris has been murdered What do I do? Filch
__________________
Then Huor spoke and said: "Yet if it stands but a little while, then out of your house shall come the hope of Elves and Men. This I say to you, lord, with the eyes of death: though we part here for ever, and I shall not look on your white walls again, from you and me a new star shall arise. Farewell!" The Silmarillion, Nirnaeth Arnoediad, Page 230 |
|
11-12-2004, 12:57 AM | #10 |
Sapling
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: hobbit hole
Posts: 12
|
Argus:
She was old. And ugly. Please do not cry, for I have no sympathy for you. Do not bury her on school grounds. Your friend, Severus =========== Dear Severus, I have foreseen that you will soon be meeting a short fat and ugly stranger. Please come to my classroom and I will tell you the rest of your future. Sybil Trelawny |
11-12-2004, 01:13 AM | #11 |
Elven Warrior
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 345
|
[QUOTE=Telcontar_Dunedain]Damn, I'm always leaving that places, I'll be round to collect it as soon as I can give Dumbledore the slip.
Snape I think they meant he forgot to bring it to the meeting
__________________
"The first rule about Fight Club, You don't talk about Fight Club." |
11-12-2004, 05:52 AM | #12 | |
Fëanorophobic
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Between the pages of a book
Posts: 1,417
|
Quote:
I never used to believed in Divination, until I met Hermione Granger's mom in the hallway right after reading your note. Expect my visit very soon! Severus Fom: webmaster@deatheaters.org To: sevsnape@hogwarts.co.uk Dear Mr Snape, Care to own the Death Eaters priviliges card? It earns you up to 30% discount in any shop in Knock Turn Alley, PLUS it has a handy, built-in, wand for any Potter related emergencies. Please contact me if you're interested to learn more. May the Dark Lord bless you, Webmaster |
|
11-12-2004, 11:49 PM | #13 |
The Infamous Tea Hobbit
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Riding my Attack Llama, CORY!
Posts: 1,162
|
Beren!!! Thats hilarious! *dies of laughter* alrighty, got the hang of it now.
Re: Webmaster@deatheaters.org From: Drk_artz_4me@hotowl.com Sure, sign me up. Do we get free DeathEaters robes dry cleaning because I am getting tired of people getting killed and splatting blood all over my robes. S. Snape ================= Snivellus, BARK. Padfoot
__________________
If I can stop one heart from aching, I shall not live in vain. -Emily Dickinson But the Master comes, and the foolish crowd Never can quite understand The worth of a soul and the change that is wrought By the touch of the Master's hand. Though she be but little, she is fierce! -MSND |
11-13-2004, 09:49 PM | #14 |
Sapling
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Minnesota, USA
Posts: 8
|
"Padfoot",
Do NOT bother me again, Fred and George! Twenty points from Griffindor! -Severus __________________________________________________ ______________ Professor Snape, Oh, wise one, how must I make 's Eye potion? Please instruct me, oh great master. -Draco Malfoy. (hint: he's sucking up. :P)
__________________
Knowledge is Power www.guardiansgrove.com <<<< A message board oddly similar to this one, yet more of an offshoot of the message board Heroes Community, a site devoted to the TBS, Heroes of Might and Magic. (sorry if that confused you. ) |
11-14-2004, 04:30 AM | #15 |
Warrior of the House of Hador
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 4,651
|
Umm Vadskye, Padfoot is Sirius not Fred and George!
__________________
Then Huor spoke and said: "Yet if it stands but a little while, then out of your house shall come the hope of Elves and Men. This I say to you, lord, with the eyes of death: though we part here for ever, and I shall not look on your white walls again, from you and me a new star shall arise. Farewell!" The Silmarillion, Nirnaeth Arnoediad, Page 230 |
11-14-2004, 04:52 AM | #16 | |
Fëanorophobic
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Between the pages of a book
Posts: 1,417
|
Quote:
Eye potion is a very advanced type of potion. You need to (very carefully) mix some frog mucus with 3 drops of ant urine and a hint of spider eyelashes. Now -carefully, mind you- stir the mixture for 3.25 minutes and finally point your wand at it and perform the Microwavus Ovenus spell we've been working on in class. Once your Eye potion is ready, I suggest you try it on Mr. Potter it causes temporary blindness with a very severe rash. Enjoy! Kindest regards Prof. Snape P.S.: Kindly send your father my regards; tell him: "we will bask together in the Black Light one day" (he'll understand). --------------------------------------------------------------------- Dear Severus I'm very concerned about your choice of career. Do you think it pays to be a Death Eater, sweetie? I think you have a great deal of potential. I wish you had taken up after your great uncle Disgustus. Now he was a real man! He scooped up lizard entrails for the Dark Lord for 30 great years of his life; and you? You choose to be a Death Eater. I can't believe you! Please, honey call me as soon as possible. I want to hear about the new career path you're going to choose! Your very concerned Mother Med Usa |
|
11-14-2004, 04:53 PM | #17 |
Warrior of the House of Hador
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 4,651
|
Mother,
I am quite happy where I am thank you. Luckily for you I'm not discussing you career paths! Severus Mr A Dumbledore I am writing to you regarding the spot for The Defence Against The Dark Arts teaching position. S Snape
__________________
Then Huor spoke and said: "Yet if it stands but a little while, then out of your house shall come the hope of Elves and Men. This I say to you, lord, with the eyes of death: though we part here for ever, and I shall not look on your white walls again, from you and me a new star shall arise. Farewell!" The Silmarillion, Nirnaeth Arnoediad, Page 230 |
11-17-2004, 05:09 PM | #18 | |
Sapling
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Minnesota, USA
Posts: 8
|
Quote:
You have done so already, on many occasions. I will, as previously stated, inform you if you to take the position. Have a good day. -Dumbledore __________________________________________________ _______________ Professor Snape Wouldn't it be a pity if all your nice tidy bottles fell off their shelves? He he he he... -Peeves. Oh, and Telcontar_Dunedain- I knew that- Snape doesn't. So he assumes it's Fred and George again.
__________________
Knowledge is Power www.guardiansgrove.com <<<< A message board oddly similar to this one, yet more of an offshoot of the message board Heroes Community, a site devoted to the TBS, Heroes of Might and Magic. (sorry if that confused you. ) Last edited by Vadskye : 12-20-2004 at 02:17 PM. |
|
11-20-2004, 02:28 PM | #19 |
The Infamous Tea Hobbit
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Riding my Attack Llama, CORY!
Posts: 1,162
|
Ah yes, but Snape did know who Padfoot was. Remember when Harry warned him in OOTP, "He's got Padfoot at the place where its hidden." and snape went to check on Sirius? Yeah ok.
Peeves, Wouldn't it be a pity if the Bloody Baron found out about your shenanigans? S. Snape. ________________________________ Severus, Please stop leaving doggy treats on the Grimmauld Place kitchen table. Very tactless, Sirius has been raving and Dumbledore is not amused. R. J. Lupin
__________________
If I can stop one heart from aching, I shall not live in vain. -Emily Dickinson But the Master comes, and the foolish crowd Never can quite understand The worth of a soul and the change that is wrought By the touch of the Master's hand. Though she be but little, she is fierce! -MSND |
11-30-2004, 07:09 PM | #20 | |
Elven Warrior
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Canada
Posts: 256
|
Quote:
God can't anyone take a joke!? I know you two don't have a sense of humour but I thought Dumbledore might. Severus P.S. Tell Sirius I said "bark, woof, rrrrrrr." ________________________________ Snape, How do you type with boxing gloves on.. uh.. i mean oh crap! fhqwgads ________________________________ www.homestarrunner.com
__________________
Earendel arose where the shadow flows At Ocean's silent brim; Through the mouth of night as a ray of light Where the shores are sheer and dim He launched his bark like a silver spark From the last and lonely sand; Then on sunlit breath of day's fiery death He sailed from Westerland |
|
|
|
Similar Threads | ||||
Thread | Thread Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post |
Why not Snape? | PippinTook | Harry Potter | 35 | 11-23-2007 02:00 PM |
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince | Rûdhaglarien | Harry Potter | 440 | 08-04-2007 12:44 AM |
Teacup Café XVII | Earniel | General Messages | 1006 | 03-23-2007 04:15 PM |
Bothering Snape... | Sheeana | Harry Potter | 5 | 10-25-2003 08:26 PM |
James and Snape | Fimbrethil | Harry Potter | 17 | 08-14-2003 04:03 AM |