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#1 |
Dread Mothy Lord and Halfwitted Apprentice Loremaster
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Thomas Aquinas College, Santa Paula, CA
Posts: 10,820
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Non-Fiction
By request of the Lady Lizra, boys and girls, ladies and gentlemen, I give you the Non-Fiction Thread!
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Crux fidelis, inter omnes arbor una nobilis. Nulla talem silva profert, fronde, flore, germine. Dulce lignum, dulce clavo, dulce pondus sustinens. 'With a melon?' - Eric Idle |
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#2 |
Fowl Administrator
Join Date: Dec 1999
Location: Calgary or Edmonton, Canada
Posts: 53,420
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Only one?
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All of IronParrot's posts are guaranteed to be 100% intelligent and/or sarcastic, comprising no genetically modified content and tested on no cute furry little animals unless the SPCA is looking elsewhere. If you observe a failure to uphold this warranty, please contact a forum administrator immediately to receive a full refund on your Entmoot registration. Blog: Nick's Café Canadien |
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#3 |
Dread Mothy Lord and Halfwitted Apprentice Loremaster
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Thomas Aquinas College, Santa Paula, CA
Posts: 10,820
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So far.
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Crux fidelis, inter omnes arbor una nobilis. Nulla talem silva profert, fronde, flore, germine. Dulce lignum, dulce clavo, dulce pondus sustinens. 'With a melon?' - Eric Idle |
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#4 |
Domesticated Swing Babe
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Reality
Posts: 5,340
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Garden Freinds April 2002
My you're speedy!
![]() ![]() April 2002 Garden Friends The calendar says spring is here! I can't hardly believe it. Part of me is still waiting for winter, but I'll just ignore that part. My garden seems to be following the calendar also. Even in the frosty cold micro-climate of a country garden, a recent walk revealed quite a few friends. Some of the brave new shoots are viola, poppy, iris and primrose, lambs ear, yarrow, foxglove and hollyhock, lupin, feverfew, painted daisy, and malva, phlox, larkspur, rose campion and valerian. The new spring bulbs are coming up, as are lots of day lilies, artemesia, dames rocket, columbine, pinks, allium, catmint, catnip, bronze fennel and loosestrife. There's plenty of "I don't know" and "I can't remember" plus old reliables like black eyed Susan, Shasta daisy, forget me not, sedum and surprise lily. I suppose its time to get out there and do something! The Outdoor Room The current trend of the garden becoming an outdoor room is reality for me. This month I'll start to bring out some of the many garden "hardware" items I've accumulated. You don't have to spend a lot of money to outfit your new room. Look outside first. Stones, stumps, and logs are naturals for the outdoor room. Anything big, bulky, or unusual is a good candidate. Just carefully roll it in place without hurting your back. Next, scavenge the shed, barn, or wherever you put things you don't need or want anymore. Weathered, beat up oddities look great in the garden. Then for the one or two signature items that really make your outside room special, look to the garden shops. Just tell your family what you want for that birthday, Mother's, or Father's day gift. A gift certificate from your favorite garden shop is another way to get that snazzy gazing ball or beautiful wind chime. The most important thing in my garden is the bench. All garden work requires a sit and study session before it's done, and a lengthy rest period after. Why, there's no point in having a garden if you can't relax in it! Remember, the garden is supposed to enhance your life, not vice-versa. This year I plan to take things a step further. Just sitting isn't enough. We need a place to lie down. Naps are one of life's great pleasures and siestas should be mandatory for all folks over forty! A snooze in the shade on a warm summer day is wonderful, and the addition of singing birds and a sweet scented breeze takes it over the top. A hammock or chaise lounge with a waterproof cushion just might do the trick. A garden works best when it's a multi-sensory experience. With the wonderful longer days of early spring, new bird songs have filled the air. It's not just "chick a dee dee dee " anymore! As it begins to warm up enough to actually spend time outside, I'll add my own touch to the sound mix, with bells and wind chimes. Wind chimes are a very popular non-growing garden item. I try to take advantage of the country breeze by placing several wind chimes in different areas. For me, the hallmark of summer is to hear the melodious sound of wind chimes when drifting off to sleep with the window open. Of course, we better not forget Mother Nature's fickle ways. There can still be frost or snow, and lots of nasty wind and rain. Don't bring out anything too fragile, or be prepared to trot it right back in when the weather temporarily reverts back to winter. Remember not to work in your garden if it's too wet. April showers seem to bring May showers, so only dig and divide when the soil has had a chance to dry out. Play it by ear, but begin to enjoy the new garden season because it's here!
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Happy Atheist Go Democrats! Last edited by Lizra : 04-22-2003 at 10:25 PM. |
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#5 |
Elf Lord
Join Date: Aug 2002
Posts: 516
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I really enjoyed that, Lizra. I want more!
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Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all other countries because you were born in it. George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950) |
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#6 |
Domesticated Swing Babe
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Reality
Posts: 5,340
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Glad you liked it! That was a warm up,
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Happy Atheist Go Democrats! |
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#7 |
Elf Lord
Join Date: Aug 2002
Posts: 516
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Lizra, according to the USDA hardiness zone map, I'm in 5b. But I don't buy it, because I've known some brutally cold winters.
![]() Looking forward to your May installment! ![]()
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Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all other countries because you were born in it. George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950) |
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#8 |
Domesticated Swing Babe
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Reality
Posts: 5,340
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Well, here's a May column. Hope you enjoy it!
May 2001 "Garden Friends" It's amazing how quickly a lifeless brown garden can change into a soft green world. April's unnatural spell of hot weather created garden miracles. Sweet William, Poppies, and Peonies seemed to grow inches each day. A few days of balmy weather stretched into nearly two weeks of instant summer. It felt great and the garden was beautiful, but eighty degree weather in early April is just plain creepy. Many plants were tricked into growing too fast, too soon. I prefer a slow, cool spring that streches into summer. The spring of 1997 was this way. The air conditioner didn't come on till July and my plants outdid themselves. The spring flowers and shrubs bloomed in a slow procession. There was time to anticipate and savor the beauty each flower had to offer. Daffodils and Tulips, Columbine, Coral Bells and Dames Rocket, Poppies, Primrose, Lilies of the Valley and Lilacs, the blooms were lavish. This April, things happened so quickly I began to get grumpy. Spring blossoms don't last long when the temperature goes over 75 degrees. I was so busy looking for the sandals and sunscreen, I couldn't keep up with the rapid fire growth going on in the garden. Inevitibly, the cold weather came back and some plants froze. Most perennials will continue to grow under the frost damage, but some flowers were lost. I fluffed up leaves and mulch, trying to protect what I could, but outsmarting the weather is a losing proposition. The Perennial Divide With spring growth comes the chore of perennial division. I have to say that dividing perennials is my least favorite garden task. Like many well seasoned gardeners, I have a bad back. Digging up big clumps of Irises or Daylilies is out of the question. Television garden show hosts easily lift their perennial plants from loose crumbly soil. I've been known to snap shovel handles trying to wrestle giant mounds of ornamental grass from unyielding clay. Amending your soil and not waiting too long are the keys to success here. Many trips to the chiropractor later, I'm afraid I've given up. Friends are welcome to starts from my garden but it's "dig your own". For a wonderful guide to dividing different types of perennials, go to www.hoosierhomeandgarden.com. Click on "garden", then "divide and conquer". Garden Parties May is a good month to have a garden party. Garden parties are the cheapest and most pleasant way to add to your plant collection. I have gotten many of my plants this way. Invite all your friends who like to garden and tell them to bring a guest along too. This is a case where "the more, the merrier" applies. Everyone should bring starts and divisions of plants that need thinning out. Extra bulbs and seedlings are also welcome. Guests who are just beginning to garden, or are unable to bring live plants can bring food or drink instead. After everyone has eaten and visited, the fun begins. Have each guest draw a number. Beginning with the number one, each person can pick a plant from the days offerings. Keep going around in numerical order till all the plants are gone. It's so much fun and a great way to get free, healthy plants for your garden.. I edited out the last bit, it was all "local" happenings. ![]()
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Happy Atheist Go Democrats! Last edited by Lizra : 04-27-2003 at 09:00 PM. |
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#9 |
Fowl Administrator
Join Date: Dec 1999
Location: Calgary or Edmonton, Canada
Posts: 53,420
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Okay, if I ever need help describing or naming flowers, I now know who to contact.
![]() Most of my recent work is non-fiction, and none of it is very prosaic. I wrote a few articles and movie reviews for my campus paper, and I used to write extremely lengthy reviews of every movie I saw on a website that no longer exists. (Some of the much older ones are still sitting around in Entmoot.)
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All of IronParrot's posts are guaranteed to be 100% intelligent and/or sarcastic, comprising no genetically modified content and tested on no cute furry little animals unless the SPCA is looking elsewhere. If you observe a failure to uphold this warranty, please contact a forum administrator immediately to receive a full refund on your Entmoot registration. Blog: Nick's Café Canadien |
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#10 |
Domesticated Swing Babe
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Reality
Posts: 5,340
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I really don't understand why I have such an aversion to writing fiction.
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Happy Atheist Go Democrats! Last edited by Lizra : 04-28-2003 at 12:32 AM. |
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#11 |
Fowl Administrator
Join Date: Dec 1999
Location: Calgary or Edmonton, Canada
Posts: 53,420
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Conversely, I don't know why so many people have a seeming aversion to writing non-fiction, but that's just me.
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All of IronParrot's posts are guaranteed to be 100% intelligent and/or sarcastic, comprising no genetically modified content and tested on no cute furry little animals unless the SPCA is looking elsewhere. If you observe a failure to uphold this warranty, please contact a forum administrator immediately to receive a full refund on your Entmoot registration. Blog: Nick's Café Canadien |
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#12 |
Domesticated Swing Babe
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Reality
Posts: 5,340
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I suppose so! Well, It's nice to have something looming out there that's still "virginal"! (writing fiction ) Maybe I'll give it a small go sometime.
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Happy Atheist Go Democrats! |
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#13 |
Domesticated Swing Babe
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Reality
Posts: 5,340
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I've had a request for another shot of garden advice! Yea!
![]() ![]() June "Garden Friends" Spring is leaving, as sure as the Peonies bloom and the Indy 500 roars through. Hopefully you've completed all the big garden chores you wanted to tackle. As nature turns the burner up, it will become too hot and humid for strenuous garden work. Summer is the time to lay low and sip cool drinks. A well mulched garden can be your biggest ally in the battle to beat the heat. Mulch is truely a garden's best friend. It improves the soil while keeping weed seeds from germinating. Mulch helps your garden retain moisture during the long hot days of summer. In the hot sun, bare soil bakes and cracks like adobe clay. Under mulch, that same soil stays porous and moist. Take the time to mulch your garden now, and you won't have to water so often in the heat of July and August. There are many different types of mulch to chose from. Some of the commercial varieties are very attractive. Bought by the bag, truckload, or delivered by the cubic yard, there are various colors and textures. I really like the fine dark brown stuff that looks like good soil, others prefer the more reddish style that provides an accent color to all the green of the lawn. Mulch gives a dramatic touch in the finished look of your landscape. A sparse or lackluster flower bed suddenly takes on a crisp, professional appearance with the application of mulch. Unfortunately, your beautiful mulch often seems to disappear over the course of the summer. Several factors can contribute to the "Mystery of The Disappearing Mulch". Be sure to apply it thickly at the first go round. Not so much right against the plants themselves, but in the open spaces and the edges where the lawn meets the garden. A clear cut edging between lawn and garden makes a big difference, and an actual barrier is even better. Professionals have reccomended the black plastic edging , landscape timbers are another way to go. I love the look of field stone. No matter what your choice, the person mowing the lawn needs to take care not to blow too much mulch out, or too many grass clippings and weed seeds in. Experiment untill you find the right method for your particular situation. If it seems your mulch is actually decomposing in your garden, take cheer, this is good. Decomposing mulch is the easiest way to improve your garden's soil. When you decide it's time to top the mulch off again, maybe a slightly bigger nugget will last a little longer. One note of caution, the natural bark type of mulch seems to be freer of unwanted insects than the dyed, shredded wood pallets. For applications right up against the foundation of your house, you might keep this in mind. This year, I've choosen to use last fall's leaves in my flower beds, raw wood chips on the paths, and old straw in the vegetable gardens. The leaves were chopped up by the mower and spent the winter in trash bags. Earlier this spring, after a good weeding, I laid the leaf mulch around my perennials. I made sure to do this before the ocean of dandelions that is my lawn, unleashed its "snow". So far, so good, but I'll probably have to buy some of the fancy stuff for later applications, now that the leaves are gone. Annuals and the Open Show The perennials are putting on a gorgeous show now. Later in the summer, things won't be quite so exciting. Start planting annuals and summer bulbs now for color and beauty in July and August. Bedding plants are available everywhere it seems, and for those with green thumbs, the seed packets are plentiful too. I like to sow seeds, but I do it in flats outside to control the water carefully. Hard rains and well intentioned hoses often wash the tiny seeds away, leaving the gardener to wonder what happened. Just start tucking annuals in, here and there, but remember to water them well. Even under mulch, bedding plants wilt quickly that first month, till they get their roots established. Don't forget to put a bench in a shady spot in, or near your garden so you can rest and watch the hummingbirds and butterflies while you sip your iced tea.
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Happy Atheist Go Democrats! Last edited by Lizra : 05-31-2003 at 01:45 PM. |
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#14 |
Domesticated Swing Babe
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Reality
Posts: 5,340
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And here's is for the tomato growers....Probably the most popular home grown vegetable!
July 2001 Garden Friends Tomatoes, tomatoes,tomatoes! One of the joys of summer is that first juicy bite of a homegrown tomato. Big Boy, Beefsteak, Whopper or Sweet 100, homegrown tomatoes are delicious. I'll bet there are some gifted gardeners out there who are already enjoying the crop of 2001. Hopefully everyone is familiar with the terms determinate and indeterminate. These descriptions are important and will help you select your growing method. Unfortunately, plant labels often fail to mention these terms. Grow both types if you have enough space and make note of your favorites for next year. Indeterminate tomato plants have long sprawling vines that keep growing and fruiting till frost. If you want to eat homegrown tomatoes all summer long, indeterminates are the way to go. Some indeterminate varieties include Early Girl, Big Boy, Sweet 100, Brandywine, Better Boy and Supersteak. Determinate tomato plants are shorter and bushier. They set all their fruit once, then stop growing. Determinates are good for sauce and salsa canners, giving the big quantities of fruit needed all at the same time. Some determinates are Celebrity, Sun Gold, and the plum/paste varieties San Marzano and Roma. Tomato cages work well for determinates, but not the puny store-bought kind. Make your own out of old fencing. Be sure to stake your homemade tomato 'tubes' well so they don't topple over when loaded with tomatoes. When growing indeterminates, you definitely need a plan. Indeterminate tomato plants are genetically programed to take over your garden. Tying the vines up tall stakes and pruning out the suckers has been developed into a fine art by some. Personally, I'd rather clean my oven twice than stake indeterminates, but many tidy gardener's enjoy this ritual. Strips of t-shirt or pantyhose work best for vine tying. They are strong but soft, and gently stretch as the vines grow. Tall, homemade cages can work also. Once again, anchor them solidly to the ground. Most of my attention goes to the flower beds, so I mulch my tomatoes heavily with clean straw and let them lie. It's easy and I always have plenty of tomatoes, but the vegetable plot becomes a chaotic mess that smells funny when some of the fruit begins to rot. This method works fine out in the country, but it is rather messy for suburban gardens. Cherry tomatoes are indeterminate superstars. I trellis them through livestock panels that edge one side of my garden. Just weave the vines in and out to support them. Soon you'll have sweet cherry tomatoes at arms reach, ready to pop in your mouth. It's certainly a good idea to mulch tomato plants. Mulch helps keep the moisture level even which leads to less fruit cracking. Use an organic mulch like straw or chopped leaves and till it into your soil late in the fall, or early the next spring. On the subject of tomato cracking, it's caused when water levels are uneven. Try to pick your ripening tomatoes soon after a heavy rain to prevent cracking and a bland, watery flavor. The longer tomatoes stay on the vine, the more chance of cracking. Here are some other tomato tips. Don't give tomatoes too much nitrogen. (Miracle Grow, manure, etc.) Too much nitrogen will give you lots of foliage and few tomatoes. Tomatoes do like calcium. Save your eggshells and crush them into your tomato soil. As the calcium builds up, it improves fruit flavor and diminishes blossom end rot. Don't over prune tomato plants. If too much foliage is removed, it often results in sunscald. Tomatoes will also get circular cracks from heat stress during periods of over 90 degree heat and high sunlight. If the leaves on your plants start to disappear, look for a huge tomato hornworm. Their green color camouflages them well. Carefully move these jolly green giants away from your garden. They will become fascinating hummingbird moths if allowed to complete their lifecycle. Keep your picked and ripening tomatoes in the shade, and don't refrigerate them. Cold temperatures diminish flavor. Now, all that's left to decide is whether to take a salt shaker out to the garden with you. ![]()
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Happy Atheist Go Democrats! Last edited by Lizra : 06-01-2003 at 11:51 PM. |
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#15 |
Elf Lord
Join Date: Aug 2002
Posts: 516
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Thanks Lizra, I needed that! I really enjoy your columns -- just enough information to keep me interested, and not so much that my eyes glaze over.
maybe someone should start a gardening thread? we can't be the only two mooters that enjoy getting dirt under our nails...
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Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all other countries because you were born in it. George Bernard Shaw (1856 - 1950) |
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#16 |
Domesticated Swing Babe
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Reality
Posts: 5,340
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My pleasure HE! Does anyone else garden on Entmoot...or write interesting non fiction?
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Happy Atheist Go Democrats! |
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#17 |
Dread Mothy Lord and Halfwitted Apprentice Loremaster
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Thomas Aquinas College, Santa Paula, CA
Posts: 10,820
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The only non-fiction I've written that I can think of is school projects. And that's not interesting.
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Crux fidelis, inter omnes arbor una nobilis. Nulla talem silva profert, fronde, flore, germine. Dulce lignum, dulce clavo, dulce pondus sustinens. 'With a melon?' - Eric Idle |
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#18 |
Domesticated Swing Babe
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Reality
Posts: 5,340
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Too bad! So it was the topic that was boring? Not the writing!
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Happy Atheist Go Democrats! |
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#19 |
Dread Mothy Lord and Halfwitted Apprentice Loremaster
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Thomas Aquinas College, Santa Paula, CA
Posts: 10,820
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Probably more the fact that it's forced.
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Crux fidelis, inter omnes arbor una nobilis. Nulla talem silva profert, fronde, flore, germine. Dulce lignum, dulce clavo, dulce pondus sustinens. 'With a melon?' - Eric Idle |
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#20 |
Incharge: neighbourhood security
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: on my 499th post
Posts: 481
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wow so much to read for free. those were some handsomely written pieces.
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i am nothing. i am a cold stone, which deceives with the light it reflects, giving illusions of warmth. |
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