Phobias and other irrational anxieties

[Nurvingiel]

Originally Posted by RÃ*an

yeah, the fake cop thing was not a phobia at all - it was just a story that came out of Lotesse's funny picture.

As far as phobias, I do have a spider phobia which has improved since I had kids and had to smush spiders for them.

Positive exposure (in this case for you, not the spider ) would have helped a lot I bet.

My roommate is afraid of spiders, but I'm only slightly nervous of large spiders. She has become less afraid, however, because when we moved in there were loads of wolf spiders in the appartment since no one had lived here for a couple months.

Wolf spiders are large, grey spiders who are shy and utterly harmless to humans. You do have to remind youself of this fact when you see one of the larger ones, because they do look intimidating. My roommate is no longer afraid of small spiders.

I don't like to kill spiders. I prefer to trap them under a glass and put them outside. In the case of wolf spiders, they are beneficial to the garden too. I don't like having spiders in my hand partly because I don't want to accidentally pull off one of its legs, and partly because I don't like touching large spiders.

I don't like killing other bugs either. I actually felt guilty for a week about killing an earwig for my insect damage collection. I felt bad about this gal in particular because I killed her in a rather nasty way in order to preserve the sample. Crickets, sow bugs, and other insects go outside. Flies and mosquitos die die DIE. (But only because they annoy the heck out of me.)

I once got myself all worked up thinking I had seen a black widow (I only saw it out of the corner of my eye), but it was a harmless wolf spider (who proved nearly impossible to catch). Black widow's aren't aggressive, but I sure wouldn't want to surprise one! (This is common sense though.)

Did you know Daddy-longlegs are not technically spiders? They are insects! Cool eh?

Edit:

I read your post about staring animals Bombadillo. You would hate the squirrels on my campus! First, they're everywhere. Second, they're huge. Third, they are unafraid of humans (why should they be) and when you walk by them, they just stare at you until you're a safe distance away. They don't run away, they just stare.

[Lotesse]

I'm SO with you here! I absolutely hate to kill bugs, won't do it. I'm not afraid of any insect or arachnid, and the only bug which invariably gives me the digusted chills is the cockroach. They're the only insect breed that I just cannot abide. All the other bugs I love, and they fascinate me, and I believe it's very bad luck to kill a house spider in your house. I don't know why, maybe it's some old Italian superstition, but irregardless, I will NOT kill spiders. Or any bugs. Even with the cockroaches I'd have to hire a bug hit-man to do the dirty work. I hate the idea of ANY little animal or bug to suffer at my hands; NO way.

And Bombadillo, that Finian the Crazy Staring Cat had me rolling! And what a great little mini-story that is, for real.

[Rían]

Yes, Nurv! Those daddys are fun!

We have lots of black widows in California. I think what started my spider phobia was that when I was a little girl, playing at the house next door, the kid I was playing with said "Hold still!" and then brushed something off my neck and squished it, and then told me it was a black widow and it could have killed me. Then there's just something so utterly creepy about how they can silently come down from the ceiling ... and how they can kind of stick to you with their web if you jerk your arm to get them off

[Nurvingiel]

I would definitely be afraid of spiders, and black widows, in that situation. Again, that's not technically a phobia though (just based on what you said). That is fear. A great fear of something does not mean it's a phobia. That doesn't make your fear any less valid though.

My sensei's neighbour asked him to come kill a black widow that she had seen walk across her front porch. She didn't want any black widows around because she had a four-year-old son. He got a can of Raid and killed it. After he sprayed it, he thought he saw a leg or something move under the siding of her house. So he took the can of raid and sprayed it all along the siding, which was slightly loose. About 30 black widows dropped from under the siding, dead! He did this all around the house and killed a huge amount of them! They certainly know how to keep to themselves. Sensei's neighbour:

Drgnslyer has a great black widow story. He is utterly unafraid of any spider, which may or may not be a good thing.

We have a lot of black widows in my home town too, since like California, it's quite warm and dry there. Vancouver has more of a problem with termites, carpenter ants, and cockroaches (<- in condition that favour the little buggers anyway).

[Rían]

but what I have is also an irrational fear, because just seeing one, even outside, gives me fear reactions disproportionate to the danger involved. I thought that's what made it a phobia, altho on the smaller end of the phobia scale because I can overcome it with a lot of will power.

[Lotesse]

Scaredy cat!

I just HAD to say it eventually; I mean after all this WOULD be the thread to call people scaredy-cats in...

[Bombadillo]

Well thanks for enjoying my trauma.

Oh, Nurv, this summer a baby squirrel crept up my stoop, where my brother was sitting, and nearly jumped on his lap. It was really freaky. It might have had rabies, because after my bro noticed it there and freaked out, it just chased after him as he ran the length of our street. But that was hilarious, 'cause it wasn't me. I probably would go insane on your campus. Esspecially if the squirrels are bigger.

If you think about it, all fear is really irrational. At least it can all be rationalized away, IMO. (Some psychologists disagree.) But a true phobia always entails disabling panic attacks whenever you come across your fear, and are usually caused by a single childhood trauma that you've repressed. For example, there was a case study video I watched in psych class last year about a woman with a phobia of birds. She had stayed inside her house for three years, she was so afraid to see a bird. After many therapy and hypnotism sessions, she finally ventured outside, and actually didn't panic when she saw a bird, and was very proud, for about ten seconds, and then she literally went out of her mind, screaming like a banshee and apparently losing all muscle control, collapsing and writhing on the ground, and she didn't remember that after her husband had dragged her inside.

Later in the video, a hypnotic recording jostles her memory while she sleeps, and she dreams about a time when she was four years old and her grandmother accidentally let two pigeons into the apartment. They flew around like maniacs and eventually bashed themselves to death all over the windows, walls, and everything. Now that her therapist knew the specific event that had triggered this phobia, he was able to address that directly instead of with very general hypnosis, and in about a year she no longer needed regular visits to him.

There was another case study in the same video of a guy with a phobia of trains. His doctor tried exposure therapy before hypnosis or talk therapy, but when he brought him to the train station, he actually had a heart attack and nearly died of fear. Phobias are serious.

If anyone wants them I can copy and paste this section in my notes, come to think of it.

(Editted because I didn't indent again.)

[Tessar]

I hate bugs. ALL BUGS.

If I see a bug, and I'm not too afraid to get near it, it will die in a quick and painful way.

I -really- hate bugs.

[Rían]

Yup, I"m a scaredy cat when it comes to spiders!

The interesting thing is that what helped me the most in somewhat overcoming the fear was having kids - I wanted to hide my fear as best as I could because I hoped they wouldn't pick it up.

[Tamuril Sirfalas]

Originally Posted by IronParrot

It comes to me almost a surprise that supposedly, public speaking is feared more than death... but maybe that's because I love doing it, and I actually do better with large audiences than I do in small groups. On the other hand, I'm the same guy who couldn't and wouldn't dance to save his life out of fear alone, until I started taking ballroom lessons about two weeks ago.

So, the topic at hand: phobias, and other irrational anxieties. What are yours?

i fear public speaking, dolls, clowns, SPIDERS,and i am clausterphobic( i cant spell it ) i am scared of small confined spaces, figuring that out as a child when my sister put a pillow over my head and me sreaming muffled bloody murder. i hate speaking in front of class or large groups. clowns i wont even go into the subject, nor SPIDERSor dolls. well ok dolls scare me with their porcelin faces and plastic and ugh scary. especially when you are at someones house and they have a room FULL of dolls and they bring you in there thinking you will like it.

[Lotesse]

Tamuril- I have always hated clowns and dolls, for as far back as I can remember. You ever seen that horror movie based on Stephen King's "It," with that terrifying clown? Stuff of nightmares, that is.

Rian - Spiders it pays to be a scaredy cat around if you've got small children. Spider venom could easily kill a bitten baby or toddler, and severely sicken any child. That's no joke!

[Tamuril Sirfalas]

Originally Posted by Lotesse

Tamuril- I have always hated clowns and dolls, for as far back as I can remember. You ever seen that horror movie based on Stephen King's "It," with that terrifying clown? Stuff of nightmares, that is.

Rian - Spiders it pays to be a scaredy cat around if you've got small children. Spider venom could easily kill a bitten baby or toddler, and severely sicken any child. That's no joke!

Lotesse- yea clowns and porcelin dolls mainly scare me, they stare at you like they are saying im going to kill you in your sleep *shudder* and yes i saw the movie, and never again! as for spiders, dont get me started! i HATE them


Tessar- you hate all bugs? spiders included? well you know the pin sized spiders, too tiny to pay attention to? well there was one in my room and i screamed bloody murder. pathetic right? my sister laughed at me which wasnt nice atall but hey it must've been funny.

[Rían]

Originally Posted by Lotesse

Rian - Spiders it pays to be a scaredy cat around if you've got small children. Spider venom could easily kill a bitten baby or toddler, and severely sicken any child. That's no joke!

No kidding - esp. the black widows we have around here


We had a really big one in the garage once. It had a web in a corner near where I put the trash out, and I just watch the sucker grow and grow, until it got to be the biggest black widow I ever saw. Then one day, it moved over and strung a web across the doggie door! The cheek of that spider!

I killed it

Originally Posted by Tamuril

well ok dolls scare me with their porcelin faces and plastic and ugh scary. especially when you are at someones house and they have a room FULL of dolls and they bring you in there thinking you will like it.

yeah, they kinda give me the creeps, too!

[Lotesse]

About scary black widows like that fat one you mentioned - That idea earlier about spraying the whole underside or hidden areas of a house's exterior with the Raid can seemed like an excellent idea; I mean, if I had kids and lived in a home where dangerous spiders were kickin' it, I'd want to eradicate them all to protect my kids. That spray can of Raid idea was a good idea...

[Rían]

you shoulda SEEN the sucka! Biggest friggin' black widow I"ve ever seen.

[Lotesse]

Raid spray, I'm tellin' ya. I personally can't BEAR squishing insects or spiders, I can't bear it, but like I said if I had children I daresay I'd have no problem squishing ANYthing to protect them.

[Rían]

There's one up-side to squishing, tho - it's completely environmentally safe. Raid is poison, after all, and that is also dangerous to kids. Sometimes I do the Raid thing, though, and just keep the kids and dog away from where I sprayed for several hours. The good thing about spray is that it DOES get into those hidden, invisible places.

[Bombadillo]

We had to spray our house for some sort of pest once. You know those "bombs" that you just set and leave on the floor, and then you stay out of the house for seven hours or so with all the windows and doors sealed? Well it set the smoke alarm off as soon as we shut the front door. We just called the FD to explain and went to see a movie. Man, was our neighborhood pissed.

Ah, I forgot about dolls. Most of them aren't scary, but you know those antique ones with the painted faces that always have disproportionately gigantic eyes, that are always painted to look teary and seem to be staring straight at you. What kind of person would give that to his child I don't know. It's just as scary as having a cat stare at you; it just makes you feel wrong somehow. I saw an esspecially terrifying doll in an antique shop; it was perfectly life-sized and I guess anatomically correct, and the stupid porclain head was carved (molded? whatever) very well, so it was almost a characture of a child, but it was so glossy that it looked exactly like the kids' corpses in the movie Red Dragon after the weirdo put the mirrors in their eye sockets. That was long before that movie was released too.

[littleadanel]

Hmm, I'm not afraid of spiders... and they do bring good luck! Thankfully, there are no dangerously venomous nes around here; so most often I just let them be. I always remind myself that they catch mosquitos and flies

But what I am afraid of... are those small trucks going around in big stores, I don't know the name.. they use them to lift huge boxes of stuff up, to the uppermost shelves, up to the ceiling. I'm really afraid to go near to those, after I dragged my dad away from one ("I'm not gonna walk under that one!") and two seconds after the box it was lifting up fell down. *shudder* I don't want to be smashed by a box in a hypermarket. I don't dare going near these trucks

[Tamuril Sirfalas]

Originally Posted by RÃ*an

you shoulda SEEN the sucka! Biggest friggin' black widow I"ve ever seen.

i have a really bad memory about black widows. i lived in sand pines when i was little and remember i was on a swing set. i went near the wood pile and was chased by a HUGE black widow. never want to see spiders again, doesnt help t see eight -legged freaks in the basement with no one home and you think the movie will get you over your fear. fat chance