Do nazguls have to go to the bathroom? and other pointless questions - Page 6

***Earniel*** · 08-18-2002, 05:26 PM

How do the nazguls comb their hair?

TinuvielChild · 08-18-2002, 05:42 PM

They don't; they don't have hair! Or else they use briar patches...or they don't comb their hair at all.

TinuvielChild · 08-18-2002, 05:45 PM

Oh, this is sad. I went back and read the last page, which I had failed to read before replying, and when I read the word "Solicitor", I read it as "Solicitorc", as in TLA. Aiya!

Treebeard's apprentice · 08-19-2002, 05:43 PM

Not really a question, but:

Briefly describe hobbit puberty (changes in the body, what years it generally occurs, etc).

Please keep it clean, though. We don't want to invoke The Wrath of the Mighty Mods.

Christiana · 04-19-2003, 03:11 PM

Do elves shave their legs?

In answer to previos question, at age 23 they enlist the help of rabid penguins and sprout like trees.

Linaewen · 04-20-2003, 07:23 AM

Nay. We have no hair on our legs.

Do the Ents use fertiliser?

Christiana · 04-20-2003, 02:21 PM

of course, they have latrines, and once a month they fertilize the forest with the contents

Heather Wooltoes · 04-20-2003, 11:37 PM

OK, in keeping with the spirit of stupid and pointless questions.....

1) from the hobbit, What does "dwarf ridden pony" taste like?

2) Do you think Elrond ever regrets not kickin Isildurs butt into the crack'o DOOM when he had the chance?

3) Elrond was Striders foster father and Arwen Daddy, does this make anyone else go EWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!??ick ick ick

all typo's sponsered by budweiser

Linaewen · 04-21-2003, 06:36 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Heather Wooltoes

3) Elrond was Striders foster father and Arwen Daddy, does this make anyone else go EWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!??ick ick ick

This was discussed in some thread, I think titled 'Arwen & Aragorn- Incest?' Besides, the way you have phrased it makes it sound like they are not biologically connected (which they were, however distantly)

Sminty_Smeagol · 04-21-2003, 07:57 AM

EWWWWW!!! ick ick ick

Coney · 04-21-2003, 08:07 AM

Something I've wondered about is Dwarven latrine practices.......

I mean, in the hey-day of Khazad Dum (Moria) where on earth did those Dwarfs all piddle?..........It's an underground city (basically a cave) so if they got rid of the excess inside the cave then the air would become pretty ripe

And any underground streams that they used to carry off the effluent would pretty quickly become polluted (which I'm sure the Elves of Lorien would have had something to say about) :/

Maybe there was a mass exodus from the mines every moring.....a kinda Dwarven Bog Call.

I've also wondered if the Balrog was first awoken by an uninvited "gift" delivered from far above.........but I doubt if much thought into the possibility has been commited to paper.........it would explain the Balrogs grumpy termperment anyway.

Sminty_Smeagol · 04-21-2003, 08:13 AM

Well what else would all those deep rivets and shafts be for? What else did you think kept that Mithril polished and bright (extended edition... I think that was mithril they saw glimmering down there

) hehe

Linaewen · 04-21-2003, 08:14 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Sminty_Smeagol
EWWWWW!!! ick ick ick

*wags finger* Naughty Sminty (with weird arms) hehe

Quote:

Something I've wondered about is Dwarven latrine practices.......

I mean, in the hey-day of Khazad Dum (Moria) where on earth did those Dwarfs all piddle?..........It's an underground city (basically a cave) so if they got rid of the excess inside the cave then the air would become pretty ripe And any underground streams that they used to carry off the effluent would pretty quickly become polluted (which I'm sure the Elves of Lorien would have had something to say about) :/
Maybe there was a mass exodus from the mines every moring.....a kinda Dwarven Bog Call.

My thoughts are:
a) They evolved to have very poor senses of smell, so as not to detect the presence of Dwarven excretion in such manner.
b) They just RAN all the way out to the outside when they needed to go
c) Who cares about polluted water? When ya need to go, ya need to go...
d) that Dwarven Bog Call could have been true. They also evolved to need to only 'go' once a day...

Coney · 04-21-2003, 08:18 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Sminty_Smeagol
Well what else would all those deep rivets and shafts be for? What else did you think kept that Mithril polished and bright (extended edition... I think that was mithril they saw glimmering down there ) hehe

Never thought of that!

No wonder only the dwarves were brave enough to dig for the stuff

Quote:

a) They evolved to have very poor senses of smell, so as not to detect the presence of Dwarven excretion in such manner.

*nods* That would explain the beards............acting as a sort of filter system for the more obnoxious fumes

Linaewen · 04-21-2003, 08:24 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Coney

*nods* That would explain the beards............acting as a sort of filter system for the more obnoxious fumes

ROFL! Haha! Can't get over that. I won't be able to look at anyone with a beard's face properly ever again..

There ya go Coney. You ARE posting intelligently! Haha!

Coney · 04-21-2003, 08:30 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Linaewen
There ya go Coney. You ARE posting intelligently! Haha!

It's as close as I get

Linaewen · 04-21-2003, 08:33 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Coney
It's as close as I get

Yeah.. such a shame your intelligent posts have to be on such topics as Dwarf excretion habits.

Coney · 04-21-2003, 08:37 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Linaewen
Yeah.. such a shame your intelligent posts have to be on such topics as Dwarf excretion habits.

Well Tokien neglected to share his thoughts on these very important subjects.........so I guess it's up to us to fill in the gaps

I was going to approach the sanitory solutions that were used by the Orcs after they occupied Moria.........but after seeing the size of a Cave Troll.............I don't think I'll bother

Linaewen · 04-21-2003, 08:44 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Coney
Well Tokien neglected to share his thoughts on these very important subjects.........so I guess it's up to us to fill in the gaps

I was going to approach the sanitory solutions that were used by the Orcs after they occupied Moria.........but after seeing the size of a Cave Troll.............I don't think I'll bother

Oh, poor Coney. Can't you fill in IMPORTANT gaps? Or are all your questions related to 'sanitary solutions'

Personally, I think you spend WAY too much time thinking about toilets...

Coney · 04-21-2003, 03:05 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Linaewen
Oh, poor Coney. Can't you fill in IMPORTANT gaps? Or are all your questions related to 'sanitary solutions'

Personally, I think you spend WAY too much time thinking about toilets...

Oh no I think about all kinds of other important ME subjects...

Would the leathery soles on a hobbit wives feet really irritate a husband when they are in bed together? (or vice versa).

Do the Elves of Lorien have to dig their way out of dead Mallorn leaves during Autumn...?

If Mithril is so darned strong......where did it all disapear to?

Did the Entwives give birth to Acorns (or similar seeds), saplings or did they just take a "cutting" after the appropriate time? (and did they suffer from Entish PMT during autumn?)

Why is their such a rarity of animals in Lothlorien?

Does a Beorning crap in the woods? (although we are getting back to bodily functions with this one).

*sigh* Middle Earth is such a confusing place

08-18-2002, 05:26 PM	#101
*Earniel* The Chocoholic Sea Elf Administrator Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: N?n in Eilph (Belgium) Posts: 14,363	How do the nazguls comb their hair? __________________ We are not things.

08-18-2002, 05:42 PM	#102
TinuvielChild Padawan Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: The Barony of Carolingia Posts: 2,176	They don't; they don't have hair! Or else they use briar patches...or they don't comb their hair at all. __________________ There are only four questions of value in life: What is sacred? Of what is the spirit made? What is worth living for? What is worth dying for? The answer to each is the same: ONLY LOVE. Dance as though nobody's watching. Sing as though nobody's listening. Dream as though you'll live forever. Live as though you'll die tomorrow. EIDRIORCQWSDAKLMEDDCWWTIWOATTOPWFIO and proud! FRODO LIVES!!!!!

08-18-2002, 05:45 PM	#103
TinuvielChild Padawan Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: The Barony of Carolingia Posts: 2,176	Oh, this is sad. I went back and read the last page, which I had failed to read before replying, and when I read the word "Solicitor", I read it as "Solicitorc", as in TLA. Aiya! __________________ There are only four questions of value in life: What is sacred? Of what is the spirit made? What is worth living for? What is worth dying for? The answer to each is the same: ONLY LOVE. Dance as though nobody's watching. Sing as though nobody's listening. Dream as though you'll live forever. Live as though you'll die tomorrow. EIDRIORCQWSDAKLMEDDCWWTIWOATTOPWFIO and proud! FRODO LIVES!!!!!

04-19-2003, 03:11 PM	#105
Christiana Elf Lord Join Date: May 2002 Location: Searching desperately for a swan boat to take to Valinor Posts: 1,231	Do elves shave their legs? In answer to previos question, at age 23 they enlist the help of rabid penguins and sprout like trees. __________________ I take full responsibility for my actions, except for those that are somebody else's fault Having someone to blame is nearly as good as having a solution to the problem Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them, and you habe their shoes. ~Frieda Norris

04-20-2003, 02:21 PM	#107
Christiana Elf Lord Join Date: May 2002 Location: Searching desperately for a swan boat to take to Valinor Posts: 1,231	of course, they have latrines, and once a month they fertilize the forest with the contents __________________ I take full responsibility for my actions, except for those that are somebody else's fault Having someone to blame is nearly as good as having a solution to the problem Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them, and you habe their shoes. ~Frieda Norris

08-19-2002, 05:43 PM	#104
Treebeard's apprentice Elven Warrior Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Wherever I may roam Posts: 207	Not really a question, but: Briefly describe hobbit puberty (changes in the body, what years it generally occurs, etc). Please keep it clean, though. We don't want to invoke The Wrath of the Mighty Mods.

04-20-2003, 07:23 AM	#106
Linaewen Fair Dinkum Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Houston, TX Posts: 2,319	Nay. We have no hair on our legs. Do the Ents use fertiliser?

04-20-2003, 11:37 PM	#108
Heather Wooltoes Elven Warrior Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Hobbiton Posts: 182	OK, in keeping with the spirit of stupid and pointless questions..... 1) from the hobbit, What does "dwarf ridden pony" taste like? 2) Do you think Elrond ever regrets not kickin Isildurs butt into the crack'o DOOM when he had the chance? 3) Elrond was Striders foster father and Arwen Daddy, does this make anyone else go EWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!??ick ick ick all typo's sponsered by budweiser __________________ Sometimes the Dragon Wins. Don't p*** me off.....I'm running out of places to hide the bodies!

04-21-2003, 07:57 AM	#110
Sminty_Smeagol Manic Cardboard-Box Dweller Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: In a house Posts: 1,071	EWWWWW!!! ick ick ick __________________ I love the fishes.

04-21-2003, 08:07 AM	#111
Coney The Buddy Rabbit Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Trapped in the headlights.. Posts: 3,372	Something I've wondered about is Dwarven latrine practices....... I mean, in the hey-day of Khazad Dum (Moria) where on earth did those Dwarfs all piddle?..........It's an underground city (basically a cave) so if they got rid of the excess inside the cave then the air would become pretty ripe And any underground streams that they used to carry off the effluent would pretty quickly become polluted (which I'm sure the Elves of Lorien would have had something to say about) :/ Maybe there was a mass exodus from the mines every moring.....a kinda Dwarven Bog Call. I've also wondered if the Balrog was first awoken by an uninvited "gift" delivered from far above.........but I doubt if much thought into the possibility has been commited to paper.........it would explain the Balrogs grumpy termperment anyway. __________________ Blessed are the cracked, they let the light in Beatallica

04-21-2003, 08:13 AM	#112
Sminty_Smeagol Manic Cardboard-Box Dweller Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: In a house Posts: 1,071	Well what else would all those deep rivets and shafts be for? What else did you think kept that Mithril polished and bright (extended edition... I think that was mithril they saw glimmering down there ) hehe __________________ I love the fishes.