"Temporary" Venting Thread IV

[GrayMouser]

From Graymouser, 08/07

Typhoon Day, so no work/school.

It's been hot hot hot and dry dry dry (water shortages) so this is welcome.

And nothing like driving to a (safe) site overlooking the harbour and watching monstrous waves come crashing in while getting tossed by the wind and drenched with rain.

Be careful what you wish for- that Typhoon I was so happy about turned out to be Typhoon Marokot, the worst in fifty years, which killed hundreds of people, left thousands homeless, and caused billions of dollars of damage and massive devastation to the environment and infrastructure.

We were in the middle of it- if you've seen pictures on the news of an 8-storey hotel crashing down into a river, that's the hot-spring resort about 20 minutes drive from my home, where we go just about every weekend in the winter.

I've had some relatives of my wife staying for the past couple of weeks- mother and three kids- their house was completely flooded and they've lost everything.

Because of the topography, where we are was pretty safe, but our road/railway connections were out for a few days, with no fresh veggies/meat/dairy products available.

The entire coast for a hundred miles is literally covered with wood- a smear of logs and driftwood from twenty to one hundred feet wide, and some places piled two or three times as high as a person- God knows when we're going to get our beaches back. The harbours are blocked, and the outlying islands are relying on airlifts for supplies.

And OF COURSE our government proved to be totally worthless.

I did some volunteer work the first couple of days, loading supplies, but then went back at work, as they had all the unskilled labour they needed.

The last two days I was asked to do some special help, as a lot of the supplies donated by other countries ( Thank You, Everybody, with special hugs and kisses to the Good Ole USA ) were labelled only in English and other European languages, so I was called up to help translate instructions for things like water purification tablets, generators and pre-fab shelters- "stick slot A into tab B and then thread through C- no, that can't be right; stick tab B..."

Anyway, I realised I hadn't posted anything about this here, for a few reasons- one being that it has so dominated everything in our lives that this place has been an oasis to escape to, and another being that I've been talking about it so much on my other forum (an ex-pat site here in Taiwan) that I've really been talked out.

And to add insult to injury, I've got a week's holiday before school starts and can't go to the beach, can't swim in the rivers, can't go to the hot springs, can't drive or take the train anywhere, and the only movie theatre in town burned down last Tuesday.

Still. we're all alive and well- one of my sons was on a school drama trip to the other side of the island and it took him a week to get home- so we're counting our blessings.

[Mari]

Oh my! Glad you and your family are safe and I hope the help will keep going your (country's) way!

[Rían]

Wow!!

I smiled at your first comment, GM ("no work/school.") but have been away from the news and hadn't heard about the extent of the typhoon damage. I'm so sorry to hear that news! I'm glad you and yours are well - how long before you knew that your son was OK? That must have been a bit scary! I'm glad you were able to help out with your language skills - I'm sure people appreciated that!

[Rían]

Originally Posted by Amael

Allergies are a constant here. LOL! * Sneeze *

Yeah, I can hardly ever smell things *sniff*

Originally Posted by katya

I'm the worst hostess EVER.

katya - keep at the hostessing - it just takes practice. If I do say so myself, I'm pretty good at it now *modest look* - it's mostly a matter of doing everything possible ahead of time (I lay out the dishes on the buffet and put notes inside them of what will go in them the night before for big parties!) and then once the party starts, just go with the flow and remember the people are the most important thing (and they don't mind being asked to help with the last-minute stuff, either - makes them feel involved) Keep those parties coming!

What specifically are the problems?

[Tessar]

Wow, GM, I'm so sorry to hear about all of that :-/. That's really terrible.

[Amael]

Another boring and rainy day around here .... did virtually nothing. And summer's disappearing quickly. The jet stream has run somewhat south of here all season, bringing all types of cooler but rainier weather. Not the best thing, certainly not the worst, but days like this certainly are boring! And depressing!

[katya]

Originally Posted by RÃ*an

katya - keep at the hostessing - it just takes practice. If I do say so myself, I'm pretty good at it now *modest look* - it's mostly a matter of doing everything possible ahead of time (I lay out the dishes on the buffet and put notes inside them of what will go in them the night before for big parties!) and then once the party starts, just go with the flow and remember the people are the most important thing (and they don't mind being asked to help with the last-minute stuff, either - makes them feel involved) Keep those parties coming!

What specifically are the problems?

Thanks for the advice! (and nice to see you, too!) It wasn't really a party, just a visit from Mari. I was really worried about not making it to the bus station to pick her up, but everything worked out alright anyway.

Since I just signed the lease on an awesome new house I am thinking starting a book club. I'm also looking forward to being able to have friends over and actually having space. I'll keep your advice in mind.

[Mari]

You are moving? I thought you'd only just moved in! Will the 4 of you move, or just the 2 of you?

[katya]

Just the 2 of us and kitty. I'm just moving a couple blocks over though. When you were here it was just me and Chris and kitty and Pitty Pat so you probably didn't realize how crowded it is when everyone's home...

[Mari]

I see Good luck with the moving!

Okay, some people seriously need to get their act together. They tell me to enroll using programme A, so I did. Then they tell me I should also enroll using programme B. Fine. Then could I please do it again in writing? '*sigh* Sure, why not?'
In order to really complete all the previous enrollments, please send us a filled in moneyform before August. 'Yes! The end of all the enrolling...'

'You've not been enrolled, you have to fill in form C and hand in evidence 1, 2 & 3.'
'But I've already sent in EIGHT copies in total of those things. You have at least 50 pages of forms by now, most of them doubles!'
'You still have to do it. Please come by tomorrow and have all the paperwork ready.'
*Mari sighs resignedly and starts copying the bloody things again*

[Midge]

Someday this will be a funny story:

Last night I decided to rearrange the furniture in my bedroom. I'm ready to head to class this morning and I can't find my car keys! I search in all the normal places (purse, counters, everywhere I went last night because I obviously needed them to get home, etc.) and just as I was desperately getting ready to email my lab instructor explaining why it looked like I wasn't going to be there, I noticed my trash can. Being as desperate as I was, I searched through it, and lo and behold, I had thrown away my car keys last night as I was cleaning my bedroom.

The not funny part is where I was half-an-hour late to my class and also forgot my cell phone in my hurry to get to class. It is so hard to live disconnected from the WORLD!!!

[Mari]

You actually call your teacher if you're going to be late? Wow.
Glad you found your keys again though. Would have been a major problem if you'd really thrown them out!

[Amael]

Bad state of mind .... very bad state of mind. Another not so fun day. I believe that no matter where I am, I'm the most hated one around. Even Morgoth would be jealous of me! He's reviled around the world. I'm reviled throughout the cosmos! The good people who stayed with me through all of it ... it's wasted time on their parts. Couldn't they find something better to do with their time?

I'm glad everyone else's lives are going alright for now. I haven't seen anything too disastrous so far. That's really good. It solidifies my idea that it's only me that's the trouble with the world currently. As lonely an idea as it is, things could be much worse for the world than they are. So it's a blessing that I'm the only problem right now. Well the only problem worth brushing aside.

Ugh. What a state of mind to be in. Thought I was okay for a while.

[katya]

Amael:
You're kidding, right? You can't possibly believe that everyone in the world hates you or that you're the cause of all the problems in the world. Get over yourself? You're no different than anyone else in the world. We all have problems. But you must realize that, right? You could choose to continue spending your energy convincing yourself that you are the most terrible person in the world. I'm sure you probably get some kind of rush out of it, or at any rate it's less boring than the truth, which is that you are not reviled throughout the cosmos and you're not special in that sense. If you want to feel better though, I think you have to stop feeding into your own negative thoughts. It's scary and it's a lot of work, but you have to realize these things, the reasons why you choose to keep telling yourself these terrible thoughts and reaching for a deeper, more exciting sense of despair. I'm sorry if I'm missing something important here or if I sound conceited, but I've seen this sort of thing numerous times, in myself as well, and it doesn't have to be that way. I just want you to start being happy and at peace, but you have to want that for yourself too.
((hug))

[Tessar]

I agree with Katya. I hope you realize that what you're feeling doesn't have a shred of truth in it... the cosmos is not out to get you, and Morgoth would have no jealousy for a mere human man having a crappy time . Anyways, he sort of liked being hated, which I hope is not the case with you.

I am not trying to dismiss what you are feeling by saying that there's no truth in it. I am very well aquatinted with depression and feeling horrible about things that are either purely in my own head or just a misunderstanding.

If this is seriously how you feel, then you need to seek out some kind of therapy to help you overcome and rationalize your way through these feelings.


I am also very familiar with the feeling that anyone who's nice to you is wasting their time. I still feel like that from time to time. What you have to keep in mind is that everyone is responsible for their own choices... if these people really like you, then that's a GOOD thing, not a bad thing. Believe me, I still wake up some mornings and ask myself, "How could anyone possibly like me? I don't. I'm boring and I'm not a great person." But the thing is you have to push through that. If these people like you, then you obviously have qualities that are 'likable', for lack of a better term. Accept the fact that even if you can't like yourself all of the time, there probably is still something really great about you.

[Tessar]

This is such a tiny vent, but... dang it. :-/ I've been so stressed out lately that I developed a rash between the fingers of my left hand. Luckily is just the one hand, and it's not my writing hand, but still. I only get the rashes when I'm anxious for long periods, and they just itch a little (unless I get hot water on them. OUCH O_o) but it's really annoying when you're trying to play the piano or type.

[Rían]

Originally Posted by Amael

Bad state of mind .... very bad state of mind. Another not so fun day. I believe that no matter where I am, I'm the most hated one around. Even Morgoth would be jealous of me! He's reviled around the world. I'm reviled throughout the cosmos! The good people who stayed with me through all of it ... it's wasted time on their parts. Couldn't they find something better to do with their time?

I'm glad everyone else's lives are going alright for now. I haven't seen anything too disastrous so far. That's really good. It solidifies my idea that it's only me that's the trouble with the world currently. As lonely an idea as it is, things could be much worse for the world than they are. So it's a blessing that I'm the only problem right now. Well the only problem worth brushing aside.

Ugh. What a state of mind to be in. Thought I was okay for a while.

This is not rational, Amael - this is NOT true. Call your doctor - NOW. Post-partum depression is nothing to fool around with. Don't let it win.

[Voronwen]

Count your blessings.

You are loved.

[katya]

Rian is right. I've been reading some about how pregnancy/menstruation/birth control etc. can affect women's moods, and post-partum can be very serious, and is very much out not your fault at all. I don't think it's something that you can simply talk yourself out of.

[Amael]

'Ingwe' has been trying to get me to go have more visits with the doctors but then that probably means taking 9 pills a day, and then ending up with something worse.

You know the medicine side effect labels. "May cause bone cancer, lung cancer, 30 other kinds of cancer at the same time, growing an extra pair of arms, meowing instead of talking, emphysema, randomly phasing in and out of the space time continuum, and lycanthropy!" Actually the last one sounds fun, if temporary!