"Temporary" Venting Thread V

[Midge]

Self-discovery sucks. 'Nuf said.

It's okay though, because I'm trying to reboot to the day before yesterday and forget it ever happened. 'Nuf said.

[Jonathan]

(Someone who is smart, tough and categorically awesome doesn't break her collar bones that easily )

[Earniel]

I think I might just be able to stand a pat on the shoulder, as long as it's not near open manholes, on the top of stairs or when leaning over the alligator tank in the zoo.

So thanks, both.

[Rían]

My goodness!!! *Moothugs for Eärniel and her family*

I'm glad your Dad wasn't injured! That creep could have had a knife or something!



and sorry, Midge ... *Moothug* But WE like your self, no matter what your self-discovery discovered

[Mari]

Wow. Just wow. That's a lot.
I hope things get better. At some point they will have to, right? :?

[Tessar]

I found out my mother is telling my dad and my sister that she's angry with me. I had no idea she was angry!

She's angry because I'm "never home." Which is not true. I don't see her often because she leaves before I'm awake, and I get home after she's in bed because I stay at school to practice, but she should realize I'm at home every night because my car is there when she leaves the next morning. I don't know if she thinks I'm being irresponsible somehow, or if she thinks I'm out whoring or something, but even my sister and dad are confused about what's going on... meaning it probably has to do with something else entirely.

This is the kind of behavior she showed before she ended up screaming at my oldest sister in front of the church one Sunday morning.

Here's my question... should I ask her about the fact that I have heard she's angry with me, or should I wait and see if it just blows over/blows up? Unfortunately I'm not sure asking will be any better than waiting.

The point is... I'm not sure whether to talk to her or not. I don't want her pestering and bothering my dad and sister, who are both very stressed out with other things, but if there's a chance it might just blow over I don't want to cause a blowup by talking to her.

[Jonathan]

How awkward. Well, nobody but yourself can answer your question but if you put it like that, it seems to me that talking to her might be a good idea. Isn't a person more likely to blow over if they aren't confronted/if they keep it all bottled up inside?

[Gwaimir Windgem]

I would think it would be better to talk to her; best case scenario, the situation is defused. Worst case scenario, at least you can control the time and place for the blowing up. Get up early one of these days to talk to her before she leaves.

[Valandil]

Originally Posted by Tessar

I found out my mother is telling my dad and my sister that she's angry with me. I had no idea she was angry!

She's angry because I'm "never home." Which is not true. I don't see her often because she leaves before I'm awake, and I get home after she's in bed because I stay at school to practice, but she should realize I'm at home every night because my car is there when she leaves the next morning. I don't know if she thinks I'm being irresponsible somehow, or if she thinks I'm out whoring or something, but even my sister and dad are confused about what's going on... meaning it probably has to do with something else entirely.

This is the kind of behavior she showed before she ended up screaming at my oldest sister in front of the church one Sunday morning.

Here's my question... should I ask her about the fact that I have heard she's angry with me, or should I wait and see if it just blows over/blows up? Unfortunately I'm not sure asking will be any better than waiting.

The point is... I'm not sure whether to talk to her or not. I don't want her pestering and bothering my dad and sister, who are both very stressed out with other things, but if there's a chance it might just blow over I don't want to cause a blowup by talking to her.

She probably just wants to see you more often.

[Tessar]

Originally Posted by Gwaimir Windgem

I would think it would be better to talk to her; best case scenario, the situation is defused. Worst case scenario, at least you can control the time and place for the blowing up. Get up early one of these days to talk to her before she leaves.

Gwai I would have to get up at 5 a.m. She is always gone before I am, even when I leave for work at 6:30 a.m. (meaning I'm up and in the shower by 6:10 at the latest). I am not getting up at five in the morning to ask someone why they are unreasonably angry with me.

Valandil, I'm starting to doubt that it has to do with wanting to see me for two reasons. She does not make any effort to spend time doing things with me... my only (occasional) free days are Saturdays, and she is always gone doing things related to her hobbies (hiking, Chesterton book meeting, etc.). Secondly is that whenever I'm gone doing something (like the last two summers when I've been gone for two weeks) if I send an e-mail home to let them know what's going on, my dad will write back but all I get from my mom is a, "Great, have a good time.-Mom"

She called me once when I was up in DC, and it was to ask me to clean up the backyard of dog poop when I got home the next week. So it's not like she ever violently misses me.

Plus she rarely sees my dad because he's in the middle of his tax season, and she rarely sees my sister because she works full time and is getting her Masters. It's not like my mom is home a whole lot either... she's the head of the English department at a private Catholic highschool. But for some reason she's telling my dad and sister that she's angry at me for me never being home.

The more I think about it, the more I suspect it has to do with something else. Just don't know what.

[Gwaimir Windgem]

Then stay up very late.

[Varnafindë]

Originally Posted by Tessar

She's angry because I'm "never home." Which is not true. I don't see her often because she leaves before I'm awake, and I get home after she's in bed because I stay at school to practice, but she should realize I'm at home every night because my car is there when she leaves the next morning.

Does she think you ought to come home in the evenings instead of staying at school to practice? I'd guess you have good reasons for staying.

[Tessar]

Originally Posted by Varnafindë

Does she think you ought to come home in the evenings instead of staying at school to practice? I'd guess you have good reasons for staying.

I honestly don't know what she thinks. I have decided, for the moment, to just wait it out and see if it blows over.

I personally think I have excellent reasons. But then, as I continue to learn, my family and I often do not see eye to eye... when I was 15 they thought I couldn't sing and didn't want me to study music because they thought it would be a waste of my time, then when I was 18 they thought that I was a terrible singer and could only teach so performing was a waste of my time and I should focus on my educational skills, then suddenly when I wanted to switch to business they decided that the only thing I was good at was performing and I wasn't smart enough to do business.

Now apparently music is a waste of my time again! But they also don't think I should be doing business because what if I lose sight of my dream to perform?! But should I be wasting my time singing when I need to focus on my business classes?

I think I'm going to stop listening to my family. At least for this week because MY LORD WHY ARE THEY ALL ATTACKING ME THIS WEEK?!!? >.< Especially when I'm not asking for their opinion!! They can go sit on a cactus for all I care.

Thanks for the advice/suggestions, guys. I really appreciate it.

[Thorir Orcbane]

I have the Curse of Thumbs! Last week I cut my left thumb open in 4 places due to my wiping off the razor I was shaving with. It bled for a day! The week after, I was moving a couch and it was squished between a metal rail and the metal part of the couch, lifting up my thumb nail completely. I have to type like a chicken... facepalm

[Rían]

Ouch!!!!

Hope you heal up soon!

[Thorir Orcbane]

Thank you, Rian

[Nerdanel]

we have parliamentary elections next month, and i'm not a big fan of this one. or the prelude to it.

one of the main questions is that of languages, mainly which languages should be obligatory in school, but it's also about the rights of the people speaking minority languages in the country. finland has 2 official languages that have the same status in the law: finnish and swedish. a small minority (6%) speak swedish, mainly on the coast. presently, studying your own and the other official language is obligatory; also, everyone has the right to get service (from official institutions: not private) in any of the official languages. thus, a finnish-speaking person in a swedish-speaking area has the right to get health care in finnish; and vice versa.

a large number of candidates are promising to try to get rid of the obligatory swedish taught in schools. i don't know if they've thought through what this might mean in terms of the right to get service, in terms of swedish as an official language and in terms of minority cultures in the country. most of the arguments i've seen have been that people don't need swedish, that they need russian more or, in some cases, that the swedish-speakers are aristocratic upper-class people who shouldn't have any rights. i bet they've never been anywhere else than in helsinki and seen all the farmers on the west coast.

what i don't understand is how learning something can be bad. if there are several cultures in finland, and there are several miniority languages (no, i wouldn't mind learning some sami as well), how is it not a good thing to learn about them and their languages? i absolutely agree that it would be great especially for people in eastern finland to learn russian. but learning swedish doesn't mean one can't learn russian: it's not like one language erases another. maybe i'm the only one left in this country who thinks learning is good.

and maybe my mind is clouded by the fact that i'm half-swedish-speaking finn (bilingual, that is), who grew up in a completely swedish-speaking area. maybe i feel that my identity as whatever it is, is threatened: my language is of course a part of my identity, and also all of the culture that is associated with it. i've been lucky to grow up with both swedish and finnish and notice that all in all, we're basically all the same. there are some cultural differences due partially to the swedish-speakers' quite strong ties with sweden (but no, we're absolutely not swedes: it's just that they have tv in the language we want to watch it in ). and i think diversity is good and monocultures are boring and impoverish people's lives. i try to not let my swedish-speaking part be involved when i listen to the arguments the people who want to abandon swedish have; and maybe it's impossible to completely separate them. growing up as a non-straight, leftist swedish-speaker with gender identity issues, i might have an affinity for minorities and their rights. but over all, the arguments just don't seem thought-through and just based on monolingual patriotism, fear, close-mindedness and anti-education. the people who want to get rid of swedish as an obligatory language (it's studied for a couple of years in school) range from just that to people who think the whole culture should be eradicated and the official status of the swedish language taken away.

sorry, i just needed to rant so i can continue working on my thesis.

/the aristocrat

[Jonathan]

Nice rant. If Entmoot had a like button Ã* la Facebook, I'd push it

Good luck with the elections.

[Nerdanel]

hehe, thanks jon.

[Tessar]

Accounting is soooooo haaaaaaaard. Waaaaaaaah!!!!

>.<