The Drunk Elf Pirates and the Quest for the Holy Wine

[Sanity's Demise]

*Roya had gone back to her square with the grim look of one who is about to face certian death in battle in order for their comrade's victory. She waits for her turn once the catfishes brain a dragon pawn. With a nod from Earniel she moves three paces forward to come face to face with the queen and her remaining rook.*

Roya: *takes deep breath* This is in accordance to rule #867, to refresh our ranks with new troops! *with that she bashes the queen in the face and takes him down, now she is squared off with the rook on their turn.*

*Smash!* *Crack!*

Roya: nnnngg....*splat!*

Catfish:*Splat!*

Earniel: *removes her hat as her bos'n is dragged off the board* G'luck to you mate! Alright we have taken their queen and their rook. Their strongest pieces! Our move!

*She secretly prays for the dogfishes swift arrival, for the sake of her choclate, liquor and her crew.*

[Willow Oran]

Meanwhile, Willow has reached the captain's quarters and is now trying to explain just why the crew needs help without actually implying that they are finding themselves to be incompetent chess players.

Willow: -and the rules make no sense so it's pretty much a free for all which means people are getting hurt which means we're losing which means that we really really need someone with authority to step in and end the game before we all end up as the catfish's new slaves so I really think it would be good if the two of you came out of the cabin now so that we can resume the quest. *she pauses for breath* Please?

EG: *sigh* And just when I was beginning to relax too, fine, we'll come do what we can.

OOC: This would be Cap'n's cue to start posting again. Must go pester her for real now...

[Eruviel Greenleaf]

The Captain gets up, leaves her cabin, and strides regally towards the game board. The crew watch as she walks toward them, looking more in charge than she ever has before. There's something in her eyes that is strange more than elven. . .but no one can quite figure out what it is.

She goes up to the Catfish and speaks:

EG: You are abusing my crew. I do not stand for that. This ridiculous chess game is ending this minute.

Catfish: But you can't do that! It's not in the rules! The game can't end now!

EG: Well guess what. I'm a pirate. I don't follow rules except for the pirate's code. I'm dishonest and evil. And I say this game ends now.

Catfish: But the rules! And our game isn't over!

EG: Do you think I care?

Catfish: We won't let you leave! We'll fight you all to the death before we let you go!

EG: *sighs* Would single combat be good enough? Me versus one of you? Name your champion. . .

Catfish: Oh fine. I win, we continue to play. You win, you can go free. Fair?

EG: Good enough. And the terms? I say to first blood.

Catfish: Death.

EG: Blood.

Catfish: Death.

EG: squeeeshy.

Catfish: *looks confused*

EG: Do you agree?

Catfish: What's that?

EG: Blood.

Catfish: Fine.

EG: Good.

[i]to be continued. . .]/i]

[Elfmaster XK]

XK, who had followed the captain to the game looked on in bewilderment. She went to stand by Eärniel.

XK - How on earth did we come to be in this position?

Eärniel - I'm not really sure. All I know is the rules were really, really badly written.

XK - Aye...eer, Captain, a word if you will.

EG - [comes over still with an eye on the fish]I'm kinda busy, what?

XK - Do you really think a one on one fight with a catfish is a good idea? I mean, you're the cap'n and all, but what if it kills ye? [EG gives her a look which says 'shut up and don't insult me like that again.'] Oh fine then, but I think ye should be warned, it will probably try to force you into the water where it's at its strongest. If it has any sense of tactics anyway. Good luck mate!

[Eruviel Greenleaf]

EG: Thanks, mate. Now. Let us finish naming terms. First, this duel will be to first blood. Second, it will be fought within the bounds of this deck only, and one of my crew will draw a circle with chalk to indicate the boundaries--
Catfish: But that's not fa--
EG: I get to name the terms. It's in the rulebooks.
Catfish: Rules. Right. Of course. Must follow rules.

Sici: I thought Cap'n said she didn't follow rules. . .?
Tano: sh! *kicks Sici in the shin, but very lightly
Sici: Oh. RIght.

EG: So. On the deck, with the boundaries drawn by one of my crewmembers. If one of us leaves the boundaries, they have automatically forfeited the duel. Third, we fight with rapiers. Fourth, no one may interrupt the duel. Fifth, it will be judged by a third party, specifically. . .*stands up very tall raises her arms and says in a very frightening voice that makes everyone shiver* I CALL UPON ULMO, LORD OF THE WATERS, TO JUDGE AND WATCH OVER THIS DUEL!

Earniel: I don't think that was the best idea. . .er. . .well, too late now, she's summoned him. . .
Tano:I have no idea. I didn't know you could call upon the Valar anymore. And how does she get to?

A great mass of clouds gathers in the sky, the winds pick up and pull the ship this way and that, and a great wave rises, but this wave does not wash over the ship, rather, out of it they can see the shape and form of one who resembles a man, but is so much greater that the whole crew and all the catfish at first must shield their eyes from his greatness. But then he kindly tones it down a bit.

Ulmo: Why in the name of Eru did you wake me from my nap? I've been asleep for the last five hundred years, and then one of you has to come and wake me up. . .

EG: I called upon you to judge a duel. We are in need of a powerful judge that no one can argue with. And didn't you say you'd do something for me some time if I was in need of help? THis is now. Um. Er. Please?

Ulmo: Oh, alright. I'll judge your duel. Just don't make a habit of calling upon the Valar, they tend to get annoyed. THey don't want anyone to know we're still awake and all. RIght then. Have your duel.

EG: THank you!

and thus, the dueling ground is set--Willow draws a large circle in blue chalk on the deck. Ulmo makes his wave into a chair, and is ready to watch and judge. Tano brings out the rapiers. The captain prepares herself. All is ready. The Catfish's champion is set. Who shall win this mighty duel? And why in Eru's name did the Captain call upon one of the most mighty of the Valar to judge a small duel?

[Sanity's Demise]

Roya: *awake and nursing her injuries in a holding pen, but waiting and wondering why her captian hasn't made sushi out of the fishs with her little frog sticker* ehh?

Dragon: dont ask, she just barged up and demanded a duel and went about nameing the rules.

Roya: Well i'll be a son of a seabiscut. Since when does she follow rules?

DragonPawn: Dunno. this ought to be interesting though, Ulmo is here to judge.

Roya: uh oh. *hides behind dragon*

[Earniel]

Eärniel: Um.... I shall be going up to the look-out and um... look out for the dogfish arrival.

XK: Well, okay. But why do you look so pale?

Eärniel: She called Ulmo!

XK: And?

Eärniel: Nothing, nothing. Except that this particular Vala happens to have a good memory and will probably remember a certain incident involving a certain Sea Elf introducing a certain water-maia to the intoxicating mixture of chocolate and alcohol resulting into said maia wreaking a slight amount havoc and drowning several islands in the progress. Therefore this particular Sea Elf will make a strategical retreat out of view of a certain Vala.

Ulmo: *bending over* Say, don't I know you from somewhere? Have you ever....

Eärniel: *swallows* No, no, never saw you before, never been locked up in your underwater prison and I never saw Ossë strip while he was drunk and I certainly never took pictures of that to blackmail him later into getting me out of jail.

*shoked silence*

Eärniel: Oh, bugger!

EG: *interrupts impatiently* Excuse me, I'm trying to have a duel going here?

*Eärniel grabs the chance and quickly runs up ladder and hides in look-out.*

Ulmo: Yes, yes. *pays again attention to EG and the cafish champion*

Eärniel: *in look-out* Fhiew, narrow escape...

[Eruviel Greenleaf]

EG: I thank you, Lord Ulmo. . .the sea elf, however, is one of my crew, and we rather need her intact. . .
Ulmo: *chuckles* Very well, then, Suliel--ah, but you have since given up your old name. Captain Eruviel, then. Begin your duel.
EG: Thank you, Lord Ulmo. *bows carefully, and steps in to the circle, rapier ready*

The catfish champion also steps in, and they salute. Ulmo: Let the duel begin! And thus they begin. The catfish looks rather uncomfortable with the rapier at first, but soon gets the hang of it. Those watching with much knowledge of fencing can tell quickly that while the Captain is clearly the better fencer, the Catfish has just enough speed to always keep the tip of her sword away from its skin. At least for the first five minutes.
But suddenly, the Catfish trips her, using a tiny dead fish from its belt (I did not know Catfish wore belts. Now they do.) and throwing it on the ground, where the Captain steps on it before she sees it. She falls to the ground.
The watchers are certain that this is the end, and they will have to play chess until death--
but lo! she rolls away from the Catfish's sword, somehow not tangling her own, and does a flip, landing on her feet. While the Catfish is distracted by surprise, she lunges, her blade cutting a fin. All she needs to win the duel. A drop of blood hits the floor.

Ulmo: The duel is won. Captain Eruviel, you are the winner. The Catfish must let you and your crew go.

[Sanity's Demise]

*Roya was let out of her pen with her dragon cell mate. She staggers up and sees that the catfish merely has a cut fin*

Roya: Gah! What's all a sissy-ness fer? I ave mind ta give that fish it's due! *reveals skinning dagger, and advances*

Tano: *catches her arm* no! that might start a real bloody fight!

Roya: *in ill humor* good! I've been spoilin' fer a good scrap! All this sillyness aint doin' me fighten' blood no good!

Tano: there will be good scraps, later. Now come on, i think you would want to enter a fight fresh and well armed dont you?

Roya: *thinks and shrugs* aye, but these blighters took ou' a good chunk o' me pride! An' i will get them back if its the las' thing i do!

Tano: fine! but on your own times then! we're going to set sail.

*Roya follows her back to the ship to get bandaged up, so they prepare to set sail*

[Elfmaster XK]

XK had been watching the duel from a distance. She had pondered joining Eärniel in the lookout, but decided she didn't want to jeopodise her safety. It was better Eärniel staying out of sight if she really had gotten herself into Ulmo's bad books. Still, she didn't want to attract attention to herself. And so she waited. Watching he sister kick the scummy little fishes ass...or scales, as it were. The crew began making their way back on board the ship, and were readying to make way, but the captain remained, talking, so it seemed, with the Vala. XK carefully approached.

XK - *looking at floor Captainwe'rereadytomakeway

EG - *turns and raises eyebrow* Eh? What's that mate?

XK - Can we go now, I mean we can go now. *nervous smile*

EG - Alright, wait one more moment.

XK - OkayI'llwaitoverhere

Ulmo - *raises eyebrow* What a strange first mate you have.

EG - *concerned look* Aye...

( )

[Indril Anarion]

((After a long leave of abscence, Luthien has returned...all hail! lol..j/k))

Luthien: *watches as crew begins to board the ship* Aye, suspectin' to be sewing alot of new shirts today...those catfish are alot tougher than they look

*goes to get sewing kit* *puts out a barrel saying "THROW TORN SHIRTS HERE"* *sits next to it with her sewing stuff*

Luthien: anyone need repairs?

[Earniel]

Eärniel: *peaks over side of out-look* Darn, Ulmo's still here....

*Suddenly she catches sight of a strange disruption of the peaceful sea-surface, a mile or so away from the Nal. Ahead of the strange agitated sea, there swims a lone sea-dragon. It's the messenger that went out to collect the dogfish and who was generally forgotten by everyone.*

Eärniel: Well, would you believe it... *momentarily forgets she's in hiding and shouts* The dogfish are coming!

*The catfish see the dogfish, screech and hiss in age-old fear and rivalry, and finally turn tails and ru-er.. swim to save their fishy hides. The seadragons cheer since they've now found a decent deterrent to use if the catfish ever demand a new chessmatch.*

Eärniel: Pssst! Dragon!

Dragon: *looks up to look-out* Yes?

Eärniel: Remember I told you that if we won the game, you'd owe us big?

Dragon: *slightly concerned* Ye-es.

Eärniel: Oh, don't worry, you big worthless bag of scales, I wasn't going to demand all dragons become our slaves.

Dragon: *sighs with relief* Then what do you want and incidentally, couldn't you come down? My neck is getting stiff from looking up.

Eärniel: *looks at Ulmo* Er... no. But could you tell the captain to kindly dismiss Ulmo now? I've been here long enough and I've drunk quite a lot if you catch my drift.

Dragon: Oh.

Eärniel: And as for the favour, doesn't any of you dragons have any usefull directions for us concerning the Holy Wine?

[Finrod Felagund]

Finrollum watches sadly as the catfish swim away

Finrod: And we wish, to catch a fish, so juicy sweet!

[Eruviel Greenleaf]

The Captain waits until the Nal is moving steadily away from the site of the game before turning to Ulmo. . .

EG: Thank you, Lord, for coming. I understand you were asleep, and I apologize for disturbing you.
Ulmo: Well, the Valar must wake up sometimes. . .I believe you saved me from sleeping through a meeting! I have to go to a Council with the other Valar now, and I probably would have missed it otherwise. But tell me which way you are going, and I will call up a good wind to send you in that direction.
EG: My lord, you are far too kind. I thank you. We are still in search of the Holy Wine, and if my navigator would be kind enough to tell me. . .oh dear. She seems to be hiding. Is there anyone on this crew who has not angered you at some time, or at least risked your anger? I know even I am not free from some sort of accident concerning your Lordship. . .
Ulmo: *laughs* Would it do to tell all of your crew that I forgive them now? I am in a rather good mood now. And were I not, well, I like to keep up my reputation as a kind and generous individual. . .

Earniel:[size=small]forgiven?[/size]

Ulmo: Yes. I forgive you for getting my Mair drunk and taking blackmail pictures.

Earniel: Er. . .thank you. . .now. . .um. . .we need to be going. . .*consults maps* THis way!

Ulmo: Very well, be off with you then! *calls a nice wonderful wind to send them on their way* Fare well! And Captain Eruviel, if ever you need safe haven. . .your favors are now all called in save that one. . .

EG: THANK YOU!!! My lord. . .and some day again i hope to see thee, and may that day be far off for the sake of my life, and soon for the sake of seeing you again. . .

And the crew is steadily on their way towards the Holy Wine. . .Night falls. . .Flannery comes outside to check the maps and tell them where to go. . .

[Tanoliel]

*Tano sits near the bow of the ship, cleaning weapons carefully and humming off-key*
Tano: Hmmm, mmm, mmm....hey, dragon!

Dragon: *pokes his head up from the waves, where he has been swimming alongside the ship* Yes?

Tano: Are you taking us to the Holy Wine?

Dragon: Not me. I can't. But I am an escort for your boat, at least for a little while, in thanks for winning the chess match.

Tano: Okay. I tink the captain wanted to talk to you about the quest, though...

Dragon: Just give me a yell, then.

Tano: Yep. *goes back to humming and polishing sharp things*

ooc: EG? Did you? I can't remember...but here you are if you want it. I just couldn't think of anything to say.

[Elfmaster XK]

The Captain, XK, Eärniel and Flannery were sitting in the captain's cabin looking over the maps. They were not far from land now, and as far as the navigation could tell, this was the right place. Eärniel is measuring distances, the captain and Flannery are having a discussion and XK is looking out of the window across the vast grey ocean. Something seems wrong about it. It's very colour screaming of emptiness. Grey...bleak. But XK thought it was not empty. Something was out there, and it was following, she was almost sure of it.

Yet as she watched, she continued to see nothing. Perhaps things would be okay. It appeared the captain had Ulmo's blessing and all. She turned to the others.

XK - Captain, how come Ulmo came to help you?

EG - Eh...that is in the distant past, mate.

XK - I know but I want to know. We don't all call up the Vala for something so...trivial.

EG - Hmm. *gives XK a look that says she won't tell her.*

Eärniel - Yeah...*also gets the look* I mean, fine wind. Yes, very fine. *continues with the maps*

XK - Fine then. *leaves the room and goes up on deck* Everything okay Tano?

Tano - Aye. Nothing seems up. Alls quiet on the seas, and indeed on the ship it seems.

XK - *worried* I don't like it....

BANG!

XK - *panics and looks around frantically. The captain comes running up on deck with Eärniel, Flannery and the rest of the crew*

EG - What in the...*looks at smoke coming from one of the cannons* Tano!

Tano - *points* She said it was too quiet. *smiles*

XK - *breathes again* Okay. Didn't mean make noise...nevermind.

At this everyone goes back to what they were doing, Tano grinning to herself and XK goes up to the crow's nest to join Alex on look out duty.

XK - *as she climbs the rigging she glances out to sea ahead of them seeing small islands all around them. On one she thinks she can see the mast of another ship on the far side, but then again, it could just be a tree. She sighs* Crazy...you're going crazy! *keeps climbing*

[Sicirus]

ooc: Shall this be the part were my sister ethuliel comes in?
Sorry for being so late. My pc died...twice. Sad really. So I had no access to a working computer to go to the moot lately. But I have read the post since and =find you are very good cheating pirate elf, fairy, and other race things.

Ic; the ship rocked silently in the dark waters after a long chess match shortened by the very cunning captain of course. Each crewmember was fat with catfish meat and wine on the house or boat. Willow started to charge for wine since she had not yet drained all of hers. Evil fairies!

Sici: *cuddles with the slightly torn chess board shirt. * I'll get you fixed up in the morning precious.

Tano:*listens to conversation on deck* (uses the ultra hearing ability of pirate elves ) (Also unfortunately shares a room with Sicirus and Roya who both just installed an antichess sign on the door, for good reason mind you)

Sici: Tano? Tano? *Starts pocking with long object near bed. Tano?

Tano: What? 8grabs pokey object and throws it across the room. *

Sici: Are you still awake?

Tano: *silence* No.

Sici: Oh, then how are you talking?

Tano: Because I feel like it.

Sici: Well will you wake up please?

Tano: Fine.

Sici: yay.... I was wondering if you’d go to the potty with me? I'm scared of the Thing.

Tano: Sighs* fine. Valar forbid you getting eaten by a creature that doesn't even leave the room.

Sici: *thinks about this for a second then shrugs and walks on deck with a very annoyed tano.*

Elfmaster leans on the ships side and peers at a distant object floating in the water like a mirage. It was a beautiful mirage but was passing them in the distance in so they were not going to get to close a glance at it. Then a small black object descended from the ship and started to come towards the Nal very slowly but on its way.

[Sanity's Demise]

OOC: So i share a berth with you two?

*Roya awoke grumbling. Although she wasnt an elf, she had wonderful hearing for a, er, whatever she was. She decides to get up and follow the two berthmates too the deck to get some fresh air*

Roya: *takes in deep breath on fresh sea breeze* Ahh, tha's what I needed fer me blasted head.

*She rubs the bandage wrapped around her lacerated head and goes and sits on the prow of the ship, looking out towards the sea. The sea is turned silver with the light of the moon, occasionaly a could might cover the moon and their will be splotches of black on the silver table. She nearly falls asleep for the gentle rocking of the ship and the cool night air. Nearly.*

Roya: *with eyes half open* Wha's tha' shadow over yonder? *tries to fall asleep* Ahh! Tis nothin' but a cloud shadow. *She notices the shadow is moving the opposite way the wind is blowing the clouds, her eyes bolt open* Wha' the bugger?!

*She jumps onto the deck and seeks out Tano and Sici, pointing out the shadow to them, which was now not more than half a league away from them.*

Tano: What are we going to do? Open fire on the thing?

Sici: *nervous* No, we dont know if its hostile. And it might be stronger than us....

Roya: Should we wake the cap'n?

*her crew mates shudder at the thought of going into Eruviel's cabin filled with those pointy objects*

Roya: Well, I think we oughta....come on, i'll go in first, you two follow behind me.

*to this they agree and Roya makes her soundless way toward the captian's quaters and softly knocks on the door, ear pressed against it. All she gets are some grunting sounds and the sounds of tossing sheets.*

Roya: *opens door a crack and calls softly* Captian....? Hey, wake up, we got sommat to show you...

*the captian awakes with a dagger in her hand, pointed at the noise.*

[Sicirus]

All three crew mates* SCREAM*

EG: "What hte heck are you three up too?

Sici: Theres a big floaty thing in the water its a its a...?

EG: Ship.

Sici: Oh yeah a ship and its passing by our ship and we don't know what its business is.

EG: Did you look at it through the teloscope. (do we have a teloscope?)

[Sanity's Demise]

Roya: *clamps ears* No, you have it. Why I dont know since you 'ave them elf eyes o yourn.

EG: Never mind that. where did you see the ship passing?

Roya: Just off the starboard bow. But it's nigh impossible for tha' to 'appen cause its goin straight inna the wind tha' way.

Tano: Well, it's obviously possible since the blasted thing is approaching at a steady clip!

Sici: *whimper*

*by then the screams had woken pretty much all the crew and they all dashed into a disarray onto the deck. Near 2/3rds of them were in their PJ's.*

EG: *throws on greatcoat and boots and grabs her cutlass* Fine lets have a look at this thing then shall we?

*they go out on deck and find the crew awaiting orders.*

ExK: Battle stations everyone! all hands to your posts! prepare for night time combat.

*And so everyone goes to stations and waits with batted breath as the ghost ship approaches.*

OOC: I do hope there will be a fight. If the cap'n say no...then i'll just have to go against orders