Age differences in dating

[Earniel]

Originally posted by Khamûl
However, younger men going after older women is generally frowned upon.

I've noticed that too. And you see it in films as well. Frankly I don't see why there should be a difference. It's not like there is something wrong with older women.

[Snowdog]

Originally posted by Khamûl:
However, younger men going after older women is generally frowned upon.

In the 60's the movie The Graduate really stirred up thoughts on this.

[Arandir]

At my age (70 something in Dúnadan years), I would be very unlikely to date anyone younger than that hill down the road.

[katya]

Age isn't really that gid of a deal, but maturity is. Anyway, I know my friend started dating this guy when she was freshman, and he was a senior. They are really great together, and their relationship (I spelled it relashionship at first...) seems to be going pretty well. Now her experiences with guys in our own class were nothing special. I personally usually like guys who are about my age, perhaps since I'm more comfortable around them. The guy I are sort of dating right now is more than a year younger than me, but he's in the same grade and is pretty mature. (I'd have guessed he was 2-3 years older than he is)

[Sminty_Smeagol]

Originally posted by Insidious Rex
all you need is love. culture is the Great Oppressor. thats all Im gonna say about it.

If all you need is love, then why are you only interested in Minors?

[Ninquelote]

I'm usually interested in guys that look older and act older, I don't mind if they actually are younger. Though it's hard to find guys under 15 that are mature!

Over 18, I don't think it matters anymore. My stepdad is over 10 years older than my mum, but they love each other so I don't mind. It's fun making fun of him for being old.

[Insidious Rex]

Originally posted by Sminty_Smeagol
If all you need is love, then why are you only interested in Minors?

if i was ONLY interested in minors then i wouldnt be too worried about love.

[Lizra]

Originally posted by Eärniel
I've noticed that too. And you see it in films as well. Frankly I don't see why there should be a difference. It's not like there is something wrong with older women.

Cough! cough! sputter...choke! Indeed!
I'm turned on by the man, not the age. I do have pictures of Theoden and Gandalf up though! I have no age problems either way. Whatever turns you on, for whatever reason.

[Earniel]

Originally posted by Lizra
Cough! cough! sputter...choke! Indeed!

Okay, my way of putting it into words was perhaps not that great.

[Lizra]

Right! You meant "older women are great!" eh? sigh.... I think I'll go put some blinders on, and give my mirror a nice rosy haze.

[Eruviel Greenleaf]

I think it doesn't really matter that much, especially once you're over eighteen. So long as there's love in the relationship

My boyfriend is two years older than me, not that you'd really know he's 21. . .er. . .(right. not the venting thread. will not complain about him. really.) But two years is really nothing. Though I think, generally speaking, I like people who are a little older than me, or at least act it. Er. Don't really know why.

And yeah. . .what's wrong with older women, eh? I think it is strange how it's usually an older man and younger woman in movies and whatnot.

[Snowdog]

One thing that surely shows here in this thread is the perspective of those older and those younger. The age difference of two years between a 21 year old and a 19 year old seems to be alot more than say a 31 and a 29 year old, or a 41 and a 39 year old.

Lizra said: "I'm turned on by the man, not the age. I do have pictures of Theoden and Gandalf up though! I have no age problems either way."

That is some threesome Just kidding dear!

[brownjenkins]

i agree age range makes a big difference... i remember being 16 in high school and how big of a deal it was when i had an 18-year-old girlfriend

now i'm 36 and my wife is 30 and it doesn't even seem to be an issue

[Lizra]

Originally posted by Snowdog
One thing that surely shows here in this thread is the perspective of those older and those younger. The age difference of two years between a 21 year old and a 19 year old seems to be alot more than say a 31 and a 29 year old, or a 41 and a 39 year old.

That is some threesome Just kidding dear!

Who! Me and Theoden and Gandalf? Hey...Gandalf can watch!

[ArwenEvenstar]

I think that if someone your age would start dating Gandalf that that would be a very bad case of paedophila (sp!!). Gandalf is HOW old?!

[Snowdog]

I think that if someone your age would start dating Gandalf that that would be a very bad case of paedophila (sp!!). Gandalf is HOW old?!

I dont matter how old Gandalf is, but how young Lizra is. If 18 then several thousand isn't much of a gap... for a wizard

[ArwenEvenstar]

Well I just don't think that Gandalf is a sex bomb or anything... But whatever floats your boat

Wait a second paedophila is if your legally a child . . . Im so dumb sometimes!

[Eruviel Greenleaf]

Hee. Gandalf. Er. Actually, I just saw Andy Serkis speak, and someone asked about this sign at the Wellington premiere, that said something along the lines of "Gollum is a sex god!" Now there's a somewhat smaller but still significant age difference. . .Gollum being over five hundred years old. . . But then Gollum often actually seems somewhat childlike, at least to me. . .okay, getting a bit off-topic here. . .let me see if I can get it back. . .
right. It all comes back to where someone is in life, which is different depending on the person, not so much the age. I just broke up with my boyfriend, partly because it was really getting on my nerves how he it sometimes felt like he was almost using me as the one constant thing in his life, expecting me to be there next year and all. . .because he's graduating and has no idea where he's going with his life and all. Whereas I'm younger, and (another reason. . .) and not really as ready for a serious relationship, but I do have some direction and idea of what I want to do in the next few years, even after college. So I suppose that can sometimes cause problems. Er. There was more, but this is all rather insignificant to this thread anyway, and I guess I started rambling about this because I feel I need to talk about it to justifty it all, but this isn't exactly the place to do so so I'm going to stop now. . .er. . .riiiight. . .

[Baby-K]

Frankly I don't care too much about age differences in relationships, it's a personal choice after all. I must admit that I do tend to (usually) date guys who are older than me - the ex was 4 years older than me, the one before that 3, before that 3 and so on. I think in general I am just more attractive to guys in that age range (4 - 6 years older) because they are more mature, more settled in their careers and generally more comfortable with themselves. Of course there are exceptions.

And as for the older woman / younger man scenario - I have been the older woman (I was 24 and the guy 17) and no it wasn't a relationship, just a one night stand really. But hey, he was cute as hell and made me laugh, so I can see how many women would be attracted to younger guys. It's just for me, they lack a certain quality that would be needed to sustain a relationship. Of course I am mainly referring to my age group, where the 'younger' guys would mainly be teenagers, so that is definitely an influencing factor. But I am sure when you are a 3o-something year old woman and the man in your life is younger the relationship would have a better chance.....again, maturity plays a big role. Of course the same goes for the older man / younger woman relationship.

[Eoca]

The age issue has never really come up for me, but I agree that once once people are adults they really can guide themselves! (Even though huge age gaps may feel strange to people outside the relationship.)

I noticed noone has mentioned this so far, so I'm going to mention that the classic formula for 'appropriateness' in a relationship, at least in terms of how much younger than the guy the girl 'can' be, is half his age plus seven. So if he is 28, she should be no younger than 21.