why do people cut themselves?

[Starr Polish]

Originally Posted by Pirate

I cut myself once because I felt I disserved the pain. I had a nervous breakdown type of thing and was all alone in the house. It was the stupidest, childish and immature thing I've ever down. I have trouble feeling sympathy for "cutters" because I think it's immature. Almost everyone I know cuts or has cut and when I cut myself I sunk to their level. The people I know cut because they broke up with their boyfriend or they're moving or mom doesn't shower them with attention 24-7. They want to be the victims in their own movie about their life. Not all people who cut may be like this I have yet to meet one who isn’t. With the whole "Goth" thing and movies like thirteen and there's even a book called cut about some poor victim girl who goes to counseling, cutting has become cool, it defines you as a person.
At least that's how I feel...

I pray you never go into any kind of profession that requires you to give counseling.

While yes, sometimes I do have trouble sympathising with some cutters (see my above posts) if you cut, there is something wrong with you that is more than likely a chemical imabalance in the brain. Even people who have seemingly great lives can become subject to depression and pathological behaviors such as cutting because of these chemical imbalances.

Cutting doesn't define someone as a person any more than depression defines you as a person. Do NOT judge all cutters simply based on the miniscule sample you have been exposed to. Also, the cutting may not be only because of a recent break up or what seems to be a small lack of attention. Often there are deep, underlying issues in people's lives that no one knows about. Even the most seemingly happy and adjusted person has problems, and yes, some of those problems are gigantic and hard to deal with.

[Shelob's Hubby]

I've known perfectly happy people, who have great lives, loving families, and are good people. But when the depression hit, they just had to cut. They didn't blame their behavior on anyone else or give a reason.

[The last sane person]

Yeah, you can be totally normal person, just when soemthing happens, out comes the knife. Big whoop. What I really dont like is the people that cut and then take pictures and trade info over the internet. Now that does seem odd.

[Hemel]

While yes, sometimes I do have trouble sympathising with some cutters (see my above posts) if you cut, there is something wrong with you that is more than likely a chemical imabalance in the brain.

Yes, maybe. But it is also a fashion statement, or something that people do to gain attention. I have every sympathy with those who truly suffer from depression. I don't with people who are trying to get reactions.

I think too that while it is or can be a chemical imbalance that causes problems, it's also the case that one can make oneself worse or better by one's attitude. Now that sounds as though I'm saying depressed people should sort themselves out ... I'm not, and I know far better than ever to say anything like that. But I understand that in terms of this chemical thing it is possible that one's own actions can contribute to the depression by reducing the necessary thing - is it serotonin? - and thereby increase the depression. So it's not necessarily just a thing that is part of a person's make-up, but can also be part of a feedback cycle.

[Shelob's Hubby]

Don't any of you think that even if someone is cutting to make a statement or be fashionable isn't there still something wrong? Even if they don't have "depression", there is still something happening to make them cut. People can create their own addictions, even if there is nothing wrong with them to begin with. And people still cut for a reason even if it's that reason is being cool. Do you think that a person who thinks that cutting is cool is perfectly alright? Don't judge people too harshly just because a doctor didn't diagnose them with an excuse for their actions.

[Hemel]

Yes, I understand what you're saying, Shelob's hubby, and it is a consideration. I'm quite prepared to accept that people who cut anyway might well have something 'wrong' - but then maybe too we'd have to ask also whether people who engage in other bodily mutilations like piercings also have something wrong.

I think I differentiate because for me there is a clear line between someone who is depressed, and I mean truly depressed, and someone who is seeking some kind of effect. These latter are, in my experience, the people who also will do such things as claiming to be bi or gay as again a fashion statement or means of gaining some attention. While I accept that there may be some kind of problem, I also feel very strongly that people who do this divert attention from those who truly need serious help, and can contribute towards their being misunderstood. Also, and again in my experience, those who truly are suffering from depression and cut tend to be far less likely to show off their wounds and scars.

It is important, I think to be able to differentiate because I truly believe that the one needs treating and helping in a very different way from the other.

That's only my 2p worth, and I'm not a professional counsellor, but I have had a fair amount of experience with people who do this.

[Starr Polish]

I also agree that someone who cuts for the attention must have something wrong with them, although it is probably not depression. I could not really label it, but I think wanting attention so badly that you do something that causes yourself pain to get it is a symptom of some kind of disorder. You could extend this into piercings and tattoos (or even professional scarification) as well, I suppose. However, not many people get tattoos or piercings to focus emotional pain on a physical level. It's more about "this looks cool."

Someone who cuts for reasons other than attention would probably do everythign in their power to cover it up. It's similar to an eating disorder in the way that the cutter uses it as a form of control. If someone finds out about it they could try to take it away, and thus the individual would lose the control he or she thought he or she had.

[Ñólendil]

Someone who cuts for reasons other than attention would probably do everythign in their power to cover it up.

Ever considered why people who cut use their wrists in the first place? Typically the chest is not cut, which can easily be covered by a tee-shirt. People cut their wrists because a part of their conscious, and a little sub-consciously, they want people to know. They want to be found out, not just for the attention. They need help. It's a way of saying "Here it is, I cut. I'm in pain," which I think can be both prideful and desperate, and often both.

Yeah, you can be totally normal person, just when soemthing happens, out comes the knife. Big whoop.

This statement brings me sadness and anger. It is a big deal, and it is not fair to those who are in so much pain that they cut their bodies, including yourself, that you call it all a "big whoop". Cutting is not an average behavior, and it also is not a healthy behavior, for the body or the mind. It is a serious psychological issue, and an outward, extreme expression of inner pain, as you must know. It is something that needs to be understood, the roots of this need to be understood for each person, and the roots need to be cut, and other seeds should be watered. Cutting oneself does not help anybody.

[Starr Polish]

Originally Posted by Ñólendil

Ever considered why people who cut use their wrists in the first place? Typically the chest is not cut, which can easily be covered by a tee-shirt. People cut their wrists because a part of their conscious, and a little sub-consciously, they want people to know. They want to be found out, not just for the attention. They need help. It's a way of saying "Here it is, I cut. I'm in pain," which I think can be both prideful and desperate, and often both.

Not every cutter cuts their wrists. Many do not wish to commit suicide, so they AVOID the wrists.

And also, since it is so easy to cut the chest and hide it, perhaps it happens more often than one might think?

[Ñólendil]

[/quote]Not every cutter cuts their wrists. Many do not wish to commit suicide, so they AVOID the wrists.[/quote]

I think most cutters aren't trying to commit suicide. And it is true that not every person who does this is cutting their wrists, but most do.

And also, since it is so easy to cut the chest and hide it, perhaps it happens more often than one might think?

There are people who have self inflicted scars all over their bodies, but the wrist is perhaps the most "open" or at least common way of doing it.

[BeardofPants]

I never cut on my wrist. I cut on my forearms. The only time I disfigured my wrist area was with my nails once when I was locked in the bathroom with no access to sharp implements. ::shrug:: Anyway, nobody knew that I cut because I hid the scars underneath my clothes.

[Hemel]

Yes, not every cutter cuts her or his wrists. The cuts I've seen, and they have been nasty and serious, and even engraved words, spiteful, horrible words, have been almost entirely in concealed places. Not places that are openly visible. Places where they were not displayed or commonly displayable. These were cuts from people diagnosed with clinical depression.

[Starr Polish]

How can you say it would be the most common place to cut? If something is hidden, people do not know it's there. I honestly think that most serious cutters cut themselves on places like their hips, chest, upper arms, thighs, and maybe their stomachs and shoulders. ::shrug::

[Ñólendil]

You're right, I can't say that.

[Rosie Gamgee]

This is an interesting thread. About why people would cut themselves, I don't know why people do. I've never known anyone who did or does (as far as I know), and I've never done it myself. But, I think sometimes I could see myself doing it.
And if I were to cut myself, I think it would be because I wanted to be alone- that I would want something to separate me from other people. It's hard to explain. It's difficult to understand yourself- or at least it's difficult for me to understand myself: where I come from, who I really am on the inside. And when other people (parents, people who say they're my friends) don't understand me, I feel boxed up. How can I expect them to know me if I don't know myself? So I think that cutting myself would give me something that is mine, that I understand, and they don't, and that they don't have to. It would be something to make me different from them, something to explain why they don't understand me.
Also, I think it would be a way of getting attention. A lot of times I get a craving for attention that I admit fully is kind of peverted. I mean, I will go and do something and then show it off so that other people will think I've done something great. So I think that cutting might give someone attention, even if it is attention for something negative, instead of an accomplishment. Someone in this thread said something before about cutters wanting to be the victim in their own movie, and I think that's true. Sometimes your escape from depression is picturing yourself as the down-trodden victim, and picturing someone else (maybe your parents or your friends) as the one doing the trodding. Then you have someone to blame for your problems, and this somehow makes them easier to carry.

So, I guess that's my 2 cents worth on the subject.

[Shelob's Hubby]

Nolendil, I was just wondering if you are an expert on people who cut. Because you talk like you are.

[Ñólendil]

No, I am not an expert on people who cut. Not sure how you mean that.

As I think I mentioned here, though, I've known an awful lot of people who cut, I've lived in a hospital with people who've cut, I've heard the opinions of hospital staff-members, social workers, and adolescent psychologists. I have never "cut", per se, although I have been on the wrong end of a knife. So, I am certainly not an expert, I feel I just have something to say on the subject because I've known so many people who have, and have lived with them (my brother used to cut, too, and the theory about why people use their wrists when they do, comes from my conversations with him, and my ex-girlfriend, also had a history of cutting which led her to a couple suicidal attempts).

I do not mean to suggest I know a lot more about the subject than the next person. My most important points in this thread, I think, are simply that cutting is extremely hurtful to oneself, even if not to those around oneself, that it does not "work" (fix the problem, or alleviate pain in the long-term), and that it is a very big deal, at least to me.

[Shelob's Hubby]

Nolendil, sorry if I came across as angry. I was, but now I understand that you have a lot of experience with people who do cut. I just get mad at people who have never talked with a person who cuts, and make assumptions based on movies and steroetypes. Sorry if I offended you.

[Ñólendil]

It's really no problem. I understand the anger and the misunderstanding. No hard feelings

[Bunnie_Queen_1146]

Well I am a teenager now and I would neevr think of doing it, I am depressed all the time and never think of it. I dunno I don't think of ever doing it. I guess I'm not like it I don't really get the point of doing it. But i have read what you guys have wrote. Like depression and stuff But i really don't get it still. I am confused but I am only a teenager right now so yea I have a lot more in life to learn. Sorry For saying any of this I jsut wanted to say what has been in my mind.