Why are you weird? - Page 15

Tanoliel · 05-16-2002, 12:06 AM

uh...cap'n...who exactly are we fighting, and why?
(i know...curse all the logical hobbits...)
-tano

Eruviel Greenleaf · 05-16-2002, 12:08 AM

We are fighting the. . .um. . .some rival pirates. Uh. . .they don't like Tolkien, therefore they must be destroyed.

Got your catapult prepared?
Ready, aim, FIRE!!!

Elfmaster XK · 05-16-2002, 05:20 AM

*emerges from below decks with a barrel of icky wine that tastes like vinegar*

Wait! Catapult this, set it alight and we'll burn them into the sea, arr!

And Tano - NOw is NOT the time to be Logical!!!!!

*Wulazg is already catapulted*

Damn it! What now, we'll have to go and save him, where's the rope?

*all look confused and Cap'n suddenly shouts*

It's below decks! Arr, we used it to limbo under!

BeardofPants · 05-16-2002, 05:26 AM

<BoP sits cowering in the corner, forgotten by the crew members. Up close it can be seen that she is trying unsucessfully to suck her toes... Closer still, and a quiet muttering can be heard...>

Balrogs DO have wings... Balrogs do have wings... Balrogs DO have wings...

<gibber gibber>

Elfmaster XK · 05-16-2002, 05:29 AM

*elfmaster hears the voice ofa demented sheep*

Do have wings! Someone agrees with me! I must find this person or thing.

*goes in search of the disembodied voice, leaving the others to deal with the tolkien haters and to find the rope*

Andúril · 05-16-2002, 06:12 AM

Many questions have been asked, and hence, many answers will be given forth. (Or, you could leave out the hence, and add henceforth at the end...)

Quote:

Why do i get all the hard decisions?

Firstly, this is not a hard decision. It is a difficult decision - not hard. Get with the program! This is a pg13 thread. We don't need your sexual innuendos, okay. Secondly, this decision was placed on your plate as a result of the delegation of difficult decision making, instigated by the rightful captain, Eruviel Greenleaf. Duh. Think a little.

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smart eh?

Do you really want an answer? Too bad - you asked. No, you are not smart. It was pure instinct that lead you to draw your thoughts from mine wisdom. That is all.

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Um who's going to sound the alarm now that our bard has retreated to the cinema?

The person standing next to the alarm button, dummy. That's right, you. You might need to hit it....with that axe over there...

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What are we going to do about the ship we are facing in combat?

We are going to combat it. Using generic pirateship weapons, such as canons, and catapults.

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Is that insane enough or should I keep on going?

I think you need to keep on going. Most of us around here are quite flammable. For instance, TinuvielChild is known for her sporadic bursts of spontaneous combustion, during slumber.

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Did'ya miss me?

In a platonic kind of way, I suppose so. Scalpal....

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uh...cap'n...who exactly are we fighting, and why?

Who: They are the dreaded creatures from Zoobilee Zoo. They are coming for you. Me too. Evacuate the loo. Why: They smell, and they sing like sick hedgehogs, okay. Plus they wish to eat our flesh. Raw.

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Got your catapult prepared?

I don't have a catapult. Honestly.

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...where's the rope?

BeardofPants has it. She was doing naughty things with me - it. Say no more. 'Nuff said. Silence!

BeardofPants · 05-16-2002, 06:17 AM

Quote:

BeardofPants has it. She was doing naughty things with me - it. Say no more. 'Nuff said. Silence!

Andúril · 05-16-2002, 06:23 AM

That is just twisted.

BeardofPants · 05-16-2002, 06:26 AM

Hey! Quit punning, Anduril, or I'll have to eat you.

Anyway, I AM the definitive Evil Voodoo Goddess of Stinky Feet! What else am I going to worship, if not mine own devine tootsies?! .... Now if I could only reach them....

Elfmaster XK · 05-16-2002, 06:30 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Anduril
Firstly, this is not a hard decision. It is a difficult decision - not hard. Get with the program! This is a pg13 thread. We don't need your sexual innuendos, okay. Secondly, this decision was placed on your plate as a result of the delegation of difficult decision making, instigated by the rightful captain, Eruviel Greenleaf. Duh. Think a little.

Curse your sick and twisted little mind! You know that is not what i meant! I changed it once already cuz i wrote something else!

Quote:

Do you really want an answer? Too bad - you asked. No, you are not smart.

I am smarter than you. I am first officer, you are the thing. In the room (is the room still locked?)

Quote:

BeardofPants has it. She was doing naughty things with me - it. Say no more. 'Nuff said. Silence!

I already said where the rope was! STOP TWISTING MY WORDS!!!

Andúril · 05-16-2002, 06:44 AM

Quote:

You know that is not what i meant!

Hehe. That's what your subconcious mind wants you to believe.

Quote:

I am smarter than you.

Riiiiiight. This is Anduril here, aka Oh_Wise_One, aka The Oracle. I reak of wisdom. I knowledge.

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I already said where the rope was!

Stop exercising your foolishness. Stoppit. I gave a much more exact location of the rope. You said it was below deck. More sick, twisted innuendo's. You're almost as bad is mineself.

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...or I'll have to eat you.

Oooh, I'm soo scared. So......what are you going to eat first (rhetorical question (because Anduril already knows the answer))?

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What else am I going to worship, if not mine own devine tootsies?!

My body, okay, my body. Oh wait, you already do that. Oh well...

Andúril · 05-16-2002, 06:47 AM

Quote:

(is the room still locked?)

Yes. But the status of the room's (the room is locked) lockedness is irrelevant, I tell you. Irreverant.

Remember, I am transcendental. I could be behind you right now. Huzzah!

BeardofPants · 05-16-2002, 06:49 AM

Quote:

So......what are you going to eat first (rhetorical question (because Anduril already knows the answer))?

Um... that thing on the end of your thorax. Yes. You now have a thorax, and I'm going to eat the thing on the end of it. HUZZAH!

Quote:

My body, okay, my body. Oh wait, you already do that. Oh well... [/B]

*Eyes semi-naked picture in her shrine*

*Drool*

Yes...

Now if only I had a headshot with that....?

Elfmaster XK · 05-16-2002, 06:49 AM

Quote:

Hehe. That's what your subconcious mind wants you to believe

No, that's what your sick and twisted mind sees my words as meaning!

Ok, i'm probably not smarter than you, but i bet i'm a better archer! And a better alcoholic! And better when in command. etc..so im Better, not smarter! HA!

Quote:

Stop exercising your foolishness. Stoppit. I gave a much more exact location of the rope. You said it was below deck. More sick, twisted innuendo's. You're almost as bad is mineself.

I am NOT SICK and TWISTED! (well maybe a little bit) but you ARE!
So again i say STOP TWISTING MY WORDS!!!

BeardofPants · 05-16-2002, 06:51 AM

Quote:

And a better alcoholic!

Actually, judging by the stories I've heard, my money's on Anduril....

Andúril · 05-16-2002, 07:00 AM

Quote:

Now if only I had a headshot with that....?

Unfortunately, that is not a question. It is a statement with a question mark at the end. Follow protocol. Huzzahwuzzah!

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No, that's what your sick and twisted mind sees my words as meaning!

See what I mean? Your are sick, and in need of medical attention.

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Ok, i'm probably not smarter than you, but i bet i'm a better archer! And a better alcoholic! And better when in command. etc..so im Better, not smarter! HA!

I'm not an archer, so your arching skills are not better than mine, because I do not arch, therefore you cannot be a better archer than me. Take that. Better alcoholic? Heh! I'll drink you under the table. Better when in command? Please! You suck. I am full of authority. You should have seen that by now. It must be your subconcious, dirty mind, playing more tricks on you. Praise my name!

You aren't better. You are suffering from massive self-delusory incapacitation.

BeardofPants · 05-16-2002, 07:03 AM

Quote:

Unfortunately, that is not a question. It is a statement with a question mark at the end. Follow protocol. Huzzahwuzzah!

I'll rephrase that. Where's my damned headshot you daft South African Lug?

Andúril · 05-16-2002, 07:05 AM

Coming.

Elfmaster XK · 05-16-2002, 07:08 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Anduril
Better alcoholic? Heh! I'll drink you under the table. Better

Oh reeeeeeeeeally? I don't think so mate! If only you knew what i'm really like... besides, i prefer to sit on the table...heh heh heh!

Quote:

Actually, judging by the stories I've heard, my money's on Anduril....

Since you haven't heard any stories about me and my strange alcohol induced impulses that is understandable. If you knew you would understand. I am not the alcoholic elf for nothing.

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You aren't better. You are suffering from massive self-delusory incapacitation.

You obviously think big words scare me. They don't for i am the walking, talking thesaurus! (NOT dictionary, can't spell)

Andúril · 05-16-2002, 07:18 AM

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If only you knew what i'm really like.

Hehe, right back at ya. I amuse myself at your insignifant and hence irrelevant ramblings. Anecdotal evidence, I say!

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i prefer to sit on the table

Oh well, I guess you're just no fun at all.

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You obviously think big words scare me.

You obviously think little words scare me. However, nothing scares me at all. Except that clown from All Souls...

Quote:

for i am the walking, talking thesaurus!

You may be the Saurus, but I am the master of anything I wish to be. In your face.

05-16-2002, 12:06 AM	#281
Tanoliel Eccentric Chocolate Crow Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: The Emerald City--Seattle, WA Posts: 1,861	uh...cap'n...who exactly are we fighting, and why? (i know...curse all the logical hobbits...) -tano __________________ Wisdom for Short Attention Spans...Ozy and Millie. It rocks. Food Of The Gods: 3,7-dihydro-3,7-dimethyl-1H-purine-2,6-dione Feed Me.... Another Online Dwelling Place... "All right, I confess. It is my intention to comandeer a ship, pick up a crew in Tortuga, to rape, pillage, plunder and otherwise pilfer my weasely black guts out." -Captain Jack Sparrow "The trouble with unknown enemies is that they are so difficult to identify." -Amelia Peabody Emerson "Most people obey the orders of someone who is pointing a gun at their head." -A.P. Emerson

05-16-2002, 12:08 AM	#282
Eruviel Greenleaf Alcoholic Villain-Fancying Elf Pirate Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Lyonesse Posts: 4,547	We are fighting the. . .um. . .some rival pirates. Uh. . .they don't like Tolkien, therefore they must be destroyed. Got your catapult prepared? Ready, aim, FIRE!!! __________________ Eruviel Greenleaf in a past life. "Whoever has come to understand the world has found only a corpse, and whoever has found a corpse is superior to the world." -The Gospel of Thomas SQUAWK!

05-16-2002, 05:20 AM	#283
Elfmaster XK Possessive Villain Fancier Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: On my ship, riding the waves YARR! Posts: 2,008	emerges from below decks with a barrel of icky wine that tastes like vinegar Wait! Catapult this, set it alight and we'll burn them into the sea, arr! And Tano - NOw is NOT the time to be Logical!!!!! Wulazg is already catapulted Damn it! What now, we'll have to go and save him, where's the rope? all look confused and Cap'n suddenly shouts It's below decks! Arr, we used it to limbo under! __________________ My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies, Fairytales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly - my friends. XK

05-16-2002, 05:26 AM	#284
BeardofPants the Shrike Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: San Francisco, CA <3 Posts: 10,647	<BoP sits cowering in the corner, forgotten by the crew members. Up close it can be seen that she is trying unsucessfully to suck her toes... Closer still, and a quiet muttering can be heard...> Balrogs DO have wings... Balrogs do have wings... Balrogs DO have wings... <gibber gibber> __________________ "Binary solo! 0000001! 00000011! 0000001! 00000011!" ~ The Humans are Dead, Flight of the Conchords

05-16-2002, 05:29 AM	#285
Elfmaster XK Possessive Villain Fancier Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: On my ship, riding the waves YARR! Posts: 2,008	elfmaster hears the voice ofa demented sheep Do have wings! Someone agrees with me! I must find this person or thing. goes in search of the disembodied voice, leaving the others to deal with the tolkien haters and to find the rope __________________ My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies, Fairytales of yesterday will grow but never die, I can fly - my friends. XK

05-16-2002, 06:23 AM	#288
Andúril The Original Corruptor Join Date: Feb 2002 Posts: 2,881	That is just twisted.

05-16-2002, 06:26 AM	#289
BeardofPants the Shrike Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: San Francisco, CA <3 Posts: 10,647	Hey! Quit punning, Anduril, or I'll have to eat you. Anyway, I AM the definitive Evil Voodoo Goddess of Stinky Feet! What else am I going to worship, if not mine own devine tootsies?! .... Now if I could only reach them.... __________________ "Binary solo! 0000001! 00000011! 0000001! 00000011!" ~ The Humans are Dead, Flight of the Conchords

05-16-2002, 07:05 AM	#298
Andúril The Original Corruptor Join Date: Feb 2002 Posts: 2,881	Coming.

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