"Temporary" Venting Thread V

[Earniel]

After typing several rants and deleting everyone of them, because what's the bloody point after all, I'll just settle for this:

'Dear' world. **** ***.

Right, back to picking up the pieces. And possibly a strong drink. And tomorrow will be a bright new day. With a new category 5 hurricane at the horizon, but who's counting?

[Butterbeer]

Originally Posted by Eärniel

After typing several rants and deleting everyone of them, because what's the bloody point after all, I'll just settle for this:

'Dear' world. **** ***.

Right, back to picking up the pieces. And possibly a strong drink. And tomorrow will be a bright new day. With a new category 5 hurricane at the horizon, but who's counting?

?

Been a long old while - what the **** is up??

Best BB

[Earniel]

I'm having a bad year, and let's leave it at that.

[Tessar]

Originally Posted by Eärniel

I'm having a bad year, and let's leave it at that.

*hugs*


So last night I almost passed out on stage during our choir concert a few times. From the second we got on those risers, I knew that if I straightened my legs all the way I was going to pass out and fall over, and I almost did during the last three songs.

I had to get my dad to come pick me up. It was pretty humiliating because my friends had to help me get to the car because I couldn't really walk by myself.

I have no idea what happened. Today I still just feel slow and weak, but that could be because I couldn't sleep last night. I think I'm still just recovering from whatever it is that I've had these last two weeks. It's such a pain in the butt... not sure if I'll be able to go to the doctor either because my student insurance pretty much doesn't seem to actually cover anything.

[Mari]

I'm sorry Earn *hug*

Tess, you do seem to catch the weirdest things at the weirdest times.

[Jonathan]

Sorry Eärniel. Hang in there!

[Earniel]

*hugs back* Thanks guys.

And Tessar, you better take good care of yourself, because it sounds like you're coming down with something.

[Comic Book Guy]

The evils of bureaucracy; Joseph Heller's Catch-22 didn't go far enough.

[Tessar]

omg. You guys. I almost did a faceplant on the stairs just now.

I always take stairs two at a time because my legs are long enough that it's more comfortable for me. Well the meds must be screwing with me, because I took about two steps (four stairs up) and then my legs just collapsed under me without warning. O_o

I don't get it, I'm on a five day antibiotic and a five day steroid pack along with some codien based cough syrup.... I didn't do much of anything yesterday, certainly nothing that should make me THAT weak. But it totally just happened and my legs are still shaky. How weird.

[Earniel]

Sometimes it does take more than a few days to get your stamina back, says this hayfever-riddled Belgian.

Or maybe it's just a conspiracy of us short-legged people to force you to take one step at the time just like the rest of us.

[Midge]

[evil laugh class="conspiratory chuckle"]hee hee hee...[/evil laugh]

[X Perry Mint]

its so hard being accepted.

i mean - with my tessar persona - it was alright for awhile - but i waz alwaze the 'lil kidd'

so i 'upgraded' to my valandil persona - middle-aged man in chicago. went over big with the admins around here - and they took me in a lot quiker that way - but i was still treatd w/ suspishun by the "rankin' file"

tho it was a nice coo wen evun mi tessar persona was modded, then adminned

but nobuddy excepts me for hoo i em... ME, XPM!

[Tessar]

Great, now my super hero side is mocking my old, poor spelling. Just what I wanted for Christmas. -_-

[Tessar]

Today my cough is coming back and I feel like I might be starting to develop a sore throat again, and I haven't even finished the antibiotics. I have one more pill to take tonight and one more for tomorrow morning. I'm going to go see the doctor in just a few minutes and see what he says. I'm so sick of being sick and exhausted.

I also just got a call from my dad because my sister apparently called him this morning and she was on the verge of hysteria, so he went in with her to see the doctor... I think she's okay, but she's just been sick for so long without really knowing what specifically is wrong, and then I think the antibiotics they gave her messed her up because she hasn't been able to eat... so problems just keep compounding.

My dad hates his job and still wants to quit, I have finals next week, I have to sing for a grade next week and I'm still not healthy nor have I been able to practice for almost three weeks now, my best friend is having major issues with feeling guilty and crappy because his ex-girlfriend has been screwing with his mind to make herself feel more in control, and I'm discovering to my frustration (but not really surprise, considering that this is probably try number six or seven) that I can't make myself like this girl that I sort of have the potential to date... I love hanging out with her, she's gorgeous, she's funny, but frankly I'm just not attracted to girls and I can't make myself be. And all I can keep thinking is, "see this would be easier if I were a girl because my friend and I are pretty much perfect for each other," which in turn makes me feel guilty and retarded... particularly because I don't even actually want to be a girl. I love being a guy. See? Retarded.

I'm so tired of not being able to think straight. For the last three weeks it's like someone has had a hand pressed down on my brain and I just can't focus... I'll write something, and just stare at it trying to figure out what's wrong with it, only to go back a few hours later and realize that I either just made two conflicting statements back to back, or I totally misread what I had been talking about.

Isn't life super fun some times? I know everything is going to settle down and go back to normal, I'm just having trouble coping right now. This last month and a half or so has just been super stressful. Sorry for such a dumb, massive vent... I've just felt like I'm emotionally on the edge of losing it all the time lately.

[Mari]

Well, at least your rant is coherent and non-conflicting.
I'm sorry you feel sick, Tess. I know that that's not fun. I hope you will feel better soon and when you do, your mind will probably clear up too.
*huggles*

And I like you as a guy too. Not sure how I'd feel about Tessar, The Girl-version. >_<

[Mari]

I'm doing my taxes and I'm working on replying to an email that really pissed me off in a polite, not too hostile manner. Yay for Queensday *sigh*
At least I don't have to work...

[Jonathan]

Tessar, your vent is hardly dumb. It's good to put down one's feelings and concerns in words. It gets you some control back as well as eases the mental pressure a bit. And here, there are mooters to bring some comfort too

[Rían]

*moothugs*

Take anti-inflammatory drugs, shoulder does better, drugs make me sick, shoulder does worse, repeat ad nauseum ... *sigh*

At least the pain dr. has been pretty good about the pain killer drugs. We're weaning me off, but he's not going too fast.

[Earniel]

Aw, I take it the new meds weren't good then.

*hugs*

[Rían]

They have a reputation for making holes in people's stomaches although it was an excellent anti-inflammatory.

vent - marriage is hard, even with a good spouse! And I still hate Arizona, and it's been really difficult here, putting even more stress on the marriage, and we're both just very defensive right now and I hate it.

Thanks for the hugs!