01-23-2002, 06:20 AM | #1 |
Enting
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: south england
Posts: 93
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nightmare cast list
My wifes pregnant and cant sleep so we spend a lot of time on things like this....
If you had an absolutley nightmare cast list for FOTR what would it be. Imagine the front page of Empire revealed the cast of Jackson's upcoming movie as.. Frodo: Michael Jackson...with Bubbles the chimp to provide on screen comic moments for the younger members of the audience. Boromir: Hulk Hogan (does a clothesline on the orcs) Aaragorn: Pee Wee Herman.(come out from behind that tree) Legolas: Fabian Gimli: TripleH Merry and Pippin: cheech and chong Sam: Charlie Drake (Uk only will know him) Bill: Scooby doo. The Return will also have a more 'scooby' ending. 'Hey RRRaggy Sharkey is Saruman the White.' 'Yeah and I woulda gottaway with it too if it wasn't for you pesky fellowship.' Nazgul: U2 etc, any nightmares? |
01-23-2002, 07:59 AM | #2 |
Elf Lord
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Valinor, right next to Telperion . . . what did you expect, Michigan?
Posts: 1,315
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AAAAAAHHHHH!!!! *runs around in terrified circles at the thought of how awful that would be*
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The Third Age of Entmoot has begun. Angel of music, guide and guardian! Grant to me your glory! The country I eat and spend the day in is by no means the country I sleep and dream in. Define patriotism. Hold the boat, you spastic monkey! ~ Elenka |
01-23-2002, 08:34 AM | #3 |
Elven Warrior
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 319
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RE: nightmare cast list
Triple H as Gimli LOL
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Then hate overcame Fëanor's fear, and he cursed Melkor and bade him be gone, saying 'Get thee gone from my gate, thou jail-crow of Mandos!' And he shut the doors of his house in the face of the mightiest of all dwellers in Eä. |
01-23-2002, 12:36 PM | #4 |
Bard of Mangled Songs
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: West of Middle Earth...oh alright...Manila
Posts: 2,679
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Mr T as Gandalf: "I pity you fools!, Fly"
Rob Schneider as any hobbit that shows up in the fillm except for Frodo: Gandalf will probably side with Saruman after seeing the Shire in this predicament. And besides, he's got hobbit hair... Regarding Frodo, we can try David Radcliff: instead of saying "Oh Sam.." or "I do not wish to carry the ring" he can just keep on saying "Whaaat?" We've got two choices for Aragorn and Boromir: a. Bill of Team Guido in the amazing Race as Aragorn and Joel of Team Guido in the amazing Race as Boromir b. Kevin of Amazing Race as Aragorn and Drew of Amazing Race as Boromir Jim Carrey as Tom Bombadil and Gollum Jenny McCarthy as Arwen Leonard Nimoy as Elrond Courtney Love as Galadriel Mike Wazowsky as Sauron "Nelson" as all the other male elves including legolas
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Power attracts the corruptible. Absolute power attracts the absolutely corruptible. -Missionaria Protectiva, Frank Herbert Accio, Ash Nazg! Elennuru s?*la lúmenn' omentielvo (The Death Star shines on the hour of our meeting) - Darth Arathorn Put aside the ranger... Start looking for Mumakil action figures... |
01-23-2002, 02:20 PM | #5 |
Elven Warrior
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: If I told you I would have to kill you
Posts: 159
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Merry and Pipin: Bill and Ted about to take part in the "Execelant" fellowship with a "boegus" journey to Mordor.
Play Girl
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"Off the Record On the Q-T And very HUSH HUSH" Frodo lives! |
01-23-2002, 03:12 PM | #6 |
Elven Warrior
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: New York State
Posts: 309
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I'll have to think about this, but for Merry and Pippin in a take-off of LOtR (a la Moxie and Pepsi), I'd love to see the guys who played Lenny and Squiggy (Michael McKean and and David L. Lander), on Laverne and Shirley. I wasn't a big fan of that show, but those guys always cracked me up.
I'll try to come up with a list later.
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FRODO LIVES!! (sung to the tune of "My Boyfriend's Back") Now, Gandalf's back, and you're gonna be in trouble (Hey-la, hey-la---Now, Gandalf's back) Soon, Barad-dur is gonna be a pile of rubble (Hey-la, hey-la---Now, Gandalf's back) |
01-23-2002, 06:57 PM | #7 |
Hoplite Nomad
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 3,931
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Gandalf = William Shatner : after fighting the balrog he comes back with a new hair piece.
Aragorn = Slyvester Stallone : "Yo Arwen..." Arwen = Liv Tyler: DOH! Sorry about that. Gimli= Mike Tyson: When fighting orcs will try to bite their ears off. Treebeard = Keenau Reeves: They are both pretty wooden. The Hobbits= The Tele-tubbies The Nazgul= The Backstreey Boys and Nsync in one band. What could be more horrifying? The Mouth of Sauron= Mick Jagger. Well look at his mouth. Elrond = Chris Tucker. It is just a horrible thought. The Balrog= Barney Galadriel= Denis Rodman. Well his is tall and wears dresses. Middle Earth= Oprah Winfrey. She's big enough. Legolas= a 12" ( 30 cm) sprite with wings and REALLY pointy ears and pointy shoes. dressed all in green. Gollum=Jar Jar Binks
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About Eowyn, Does anyone know what her alias Dernhelm means? She was kown as dernhelm because of her exclaimation when she realized that the rider's headgear was heavy and obscured her sight. 'Dern Helm" Culled from Entmoot From Kirinski 57 and Wayfarer. Last edited by afro-elf : 01-23-2002 at 07:00 PM. |
01-23-2002, 07:17 PM | #8 |
Self-Appointed Lord of the Free Peoples of the General Messages
Join Date: Nov 2001
Posts: 1,214
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*hands coolismo a valium*
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01-23-2002, 07:28 PM | #9 |
Hobbit
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Piedmont North Carolina
Posts: 33
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An All WWF Nightmare
Saruman Vince McMann Gandalf Rick Flair 'Whoooo' Frodo Spike Dudley Merry X-Pac Pippin Shane McMann Aragorn Stone Cold 'WHAT' Boromir Triple H Arwen Chyna Galadriel Stephine McMann Balarog Andre The Giant Gimili Rikishi Elrond The Rock 'Can you smell' Legolas Chris Jerico Gollum Hulk hogan Treebeard The Undertaker the Mouth Kane Of Sauron |
01-23-2002, 08:13 PM | #10 |
Elven Warrior
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: California
Posts: 348
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...
Galadriel- Britney spears Arwen- Christina agulara Aragorn- Ricky martin Borimir- Kid rock Gandalf- Hue Heffner (the guy that runs playboy,He's not an actor and its breaking the music people chain, but still...) Legolas- Micheal Jackson Gimli- Eminem The hobbits- Any boy band Elrond- Elton John
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"The barks goes ever on and on out from the dog where they began. He's out there crapping on my lawn. Till I hit him with my van." |
01-23-2002, 09:01 PM | #11 | |
Sapling
Join Date: Jan 2002
Posts: 2
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Quote:
A little make-up and I dont think Leonard Nimoy would have made that bad of an Elrond. |
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01-24-2002, 01:47 AM | #12 |
Bard of Mangled Songs
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: West of Middle Earth...oh alright...Manila
Posts: 2,679
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How about Billy Crystal and in a 12 hour monologue complete with costumes talking and fighting with himself.
Of course, people will just think he's just doing Gollum half the time.
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Power attracts the corruptible. Absolute power attracts the absolutely corruptible. -Missionaria Protectiva, Frank Herbert Accio, Ash Nazg! Elennuru s?*la lúmenn' omentielvo (The Death Star shines on the hour of our meeting) - Darth Arathorn Put aside the ranger... Start looking for Mumakil action figures... |
01-24-2002, 02:01 AM | #13 |
Halfwitted
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Eryn Vorn
Posts: 1,659
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Gandalf - Chris Rock
Aragorn - Tim Allen Galadriel - Rosie O'Donnell Frodo - MacCauley Culkin Sam - Jake Lloyd Boromir - guy from Crocodile Dundee Arwen - Whoopi Goldberg Merry - Brad Pitt *shudder*
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Fingolfin lives! ... in my finger! The Crossroads of Arda - Warning. Halfwit content. Not appropriate for people with IQ of over 18. The Fellowship of the Message Board Nyáréonié - The Tale of Tears |
01-24-2002, 12:47 PM | #14 | |
Enting
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: The Twilight Meres
Posts: 87
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Re: nightmare cast list
Quote:
what about this: Boromir/Faramir/Denethor=Mr Bean (no, I don't mean Sean Bean here) Sauron=Michael Jackson (One Ring to rule the pop-charts, One Ring to be Invincible, One Ring to bring more plastic and form me a new face.) The Fellowship=Eddie Murphy clones.(remember the farting Klumps?) All orcs/uruk-hai=a1, westlife, bsb, nsync and all the other one-hit boybands which sprouted up last year, cloned to form an army. Mouth of Sauron= i think Chris Tucker fits this to a T. Witch King= Jim Carrey in Ace Ventura outfit. ( Ace Ventura theme plays when he appears) The shire= teletubby land, complete with monster coneys and funny speakers which pop out of the ground. (time for tubby bye-bye...time for tubby bye-bye) Celeborn and Galadriel= Leonardo Dicaprio and Kate Winslet ( im flying celeborn, im flying...) Legolas= a happy sprite that looks like a christmas decoration
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Farewell sweet earth and nortern sky, for ever blest,since here did lie and here with lissom limbs did run beneath the Moon, beneath the Sun, Lùthien Tinùviel more fair than mortal tongue can tell. Though all to ruin fell the world and were dissolved and backward hurled unmade into old abyss, yet were its making good, for this-- the dusk, the dawn, the earth, the sea-- that Lùthien for a time should be. "I am glad you are here with me. Here at the end of all things, Sam."-Frodo FRODO LIVES!!! (erm...Sam does too, right?) |
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01-24-2002, 04:02 PM | #15 |
The Chocoholic Sea Elf Administrator
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: N?n in Eilph (Belgium)
Posts: 14,363
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If you lot are trying to scare the wits out of me, you have to try harder, I'm rolling over the floor here, choking with laughter.
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01-24-2002, 09:06 PM | #16 |
The Rogue Elf
Join Date: Jan 2002
Posts: 1,722
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Gandalf = George Carlin (Need I say more?)
Frodo = Adam Sandler (Think: The Magical, Always-Cold Water of Galadriel's phial . . . ) Sam = Rob Schneider Merry & Pippin = Charlie Sheen & Chris Tucker (Money Talks, anyone? "Hey, yo, what's that?" "A pint." "Those come in pints?! How come you ain't tell me? I bet you stole them diamonds from my pocket last night too just so you could buy dat pint. You know, I'ma call da cops on you. Yeah, you done be stealin' my diamonds just so you can buy a pin--" "Pippin?" "What chu want now? My rubies? Yeah, you knew I had 'em -- you know they don't call me Rubie Rod for nothin'. I knew I couldn't trust you--") Legolas = Leonardo DiCaprio ("Uh-uh. There is no way I'm getting on that ship. You know what happened last time I got on a ship.") Gimli = Ashton Kutcher ("Dude . . . where's my axe?") or Tom Cruise ("SHOW ME THE ORC-IES!") Aragorn = Keanu Reeves ("I am the Chosen One . . .") Arwen = Lucy Lawless (Xenarwen . . . *snickers*) Boromir = Harry Potter ("The Ring is MINE!") The Mouth of Sauron = Steven Tyler (Mick Jagger ain't got nothin' on him.) The Nazgul = 'N Sync & Backstreet Boys . . . minus Kevin (That's makes nine.) Elrond = Agent Smith ("The Ring is of great importance to us, Mr. Frodo . . . and you will tell us where it-- *pauses* . . . did I just say that out loud?") Galadriel = Britney Spears ("I am now, like, going to read your minds or whatever . . . *silence* . . . My God, like, why does everyone always think that question?! Yes, they're real!") Last edited by Rána Eressëa : 01-24-2002 at 09:11 PM. |
01-24-2002, 10:00 PM | #17 |
Elven Warrior
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Ithilien
Posts: 203
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The Nazgul= 'N Sync and Backstreet Boys
Definitely. Feraway Hawkbriar, I agree with several of your choices. What a nightmare! |
01-24-2002, 11:46 PM | #18 |
Elven Warrior
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: rural oklahoma
Posts: 324
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Elrond-Rick Moranis
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"We will have peace","Yes we will have peace...we will have peace when you and all your works have perished - and the works of your dark lord to whom you would deliver us. You are a liar,Saruman,and a corrupter of men's hearts. You hold out your hand to me and I percieve only a finger of the claw of Mordor. Cruel and cold! Even if your war on me was just - as it was not,for were you ten times as wise you would have no right to rule me and mine, for your own profit you desired-even so, what will you say of your Torches in westfold and the children that lie dead there? And they hewed Hama's body before the gates of Hornburg, after he was dead. When you hang from a gibbet at your window for the sport of your own crows, I will have peace with you and Orthanc. So much for the House of Eorl. A lesser son of greater Sires am I, but I do not need to lick your fingers. Turn elsewither for I fear your voice has lost it's charm. |
01-25-2002, 01:30 AM | #19 |
Bard of Mangled Songs
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: West of Middle Earth...oh alright...Manila
Posts: 2,679
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James "Sully" Sullivan =Balrog
Casey Kasem again as Sam
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Power attracts the corruptible. Absolute power attracts the absolutely corruptible. -Missionaria Protectiva, Frank Herbert Accio, Ash Nazg! Elennuru s?*la lúmenn' omentielvo (The Death Star shines on the hour of our meeting) - Darth Arathorn Put aside the ranger... Start looking for Mumakil action figures... |
01-25-2002, 04:37 AM | #20 |
Enting
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: south england
Posts: 93
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Jim Morrison as Denethor...Come on baby light my pyre.
Gonna set my heir on.....................FAAAAAYYYYYYYRRRRRREEE dedddeedidlydidlydedeedahadhadadadah FAAAAYYYYRE |
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