My story/book.

[Thorir Orcbane]

I am in the process of writing a book and I am asking for some criticism on it so I'll post part of the story below.


Meryn woke up with a jump. The light had not yet come over the hills and the cock had not yet crowed , so he did not know what had caused him to wake. All of a sudden , he felt the sensation that someone was watching him. He turned around to see a bird , glaring at him with silver eyes. He felt his head spin and he fell backwards , hitting his head on the stone hearth , and knew nothing more.

That morning when he woke up from the knock on the head he had recieved earlier, the bird was still there. Now in the light he could see it was no noral thing , not of his world. It was as big as a wolf pup and darker than the shadows , then he noticed it's eyes, Silver eyes , like the moon. When he looked into them , he felt drawn away from this world , passing into the realm of the Sidhe , and he did not like it. "Aaah! Back you thing! Why do you come for me?" As if answering him the bird cried. "MERLYN!" .


Thats all i got so far. As you can already see,hopefully, the story is about Merlin , or in my story , Merlyn , the wizard who helped raise Camelot with Arthur. ut this is not about Arthur it is about merlin as a teenager who goes through quests to achieve his destiny and to help raise Camelot. So anyone want to say something?