Tolkien Lover Anonymous 3, The Sil(ly)marillion

[Count Comfect]

*And lo, the exiles did wander to and fro in the land, and their suffering would be great*

Random Young Tuor: Ah, no, sorry there. That's not true.

*What? Who is the narrator here?*

RYT: Not you, if you don't shut up. In case you didn't notice, we apparently still have Glorfindel with us.

*Yes. Your point?*

RYT: My point is that he might actually know where we're going. Well, him and Voronwe.

*Aha.*

RYT: Yes, and so, I think we can skip the terrible starvation and death and head right to the Land of Willows, m'kay?

*Fine by me. As long as I get to keep my job.*

RYT: Oh, sure thing.

*And lo, the exiles did go directly to the Land of Willows, with the aid of Glorfindel, and Voronwe who had pinched a map from Gondolina ere it fell.*