Some Poems

[Katie of the Golden Wood]

Originally posted by Lady Ravyn
that's so good! is it really your first attempt at poetry? i'm impressed

the only thing i have to critique is the second stanza; when you talk about the pavement, the lemonade stand and the kickball game? it sounds like it could be such a discriptive line! i can almost feel the things you're describing- almost perhaps if you described the heat of the pavement (ex: the sizzling heat or hotness); the sound of the kickball game, etc. other than that one part, it rather good!

Thanks! I'll work on, it, those were some good suggestions.

Katie