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10-17-2007, 01:22 AM | #1 |
Fenway Ranger, Lord of Red Sox Nation
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The Hidden: Discussion
Okay, so this is something I'm currently working on in between classes and papers and whatnot, a serial of sorts. Anyway, let me know what you think...
The Hidden And be warned, there's plots aplenty to be found here. (GRR!!! How did I get caught by the 90 second rule?? No way that wasn't 90 seconds!)
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Adventure...betrayal...heroism... Atharon: where heroes are born. My wife once said to me—when I'd been writing for ten or fifteen years—that I could always go back to being a nuclear engineer. And I said to her, 'Harriet, would you let someone who quit his job to go write fantasy anywhere near your nuclear reactor? I wouldn't!' (Robert Jordan) Last edited by Curubethion : 11-10-2007 at 02:24 PM. |
10-17-2007, 11:01 AM | #2 |
Kraken King
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Wow, that really grabbed my attention. This first post was very artistic, and seems to lay out a neat little....what's the word......I dont know. But it's cool.
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One of my top ten favorite movies. "You ever try to flick a fly? "No." "It's a waste of time." "Can you see it?" "No." "It's right there!" "Where? "There!" "What is it?" "A crab." "A crab? I dont see any crab." "How?! It's right there!!" "Where?" "There!!!!" "Oh." -Excerpts from A Tale of Two Morons |
10-17-2007, 05:03 PM | #3 |
Halfelven Daughter of the Dunedain, President of Entmoot
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Oh wow., Great hook. Glad to see you back, even if it's temperary. Keep the posts coming. You got my attention
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"Acaly und Hektor fur Presidants fur EntMut fur life!"~ inked Don't meddle in the affairs of Dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup. "Don't be such a sour wolf" Stiles ~ Heart Monitor http://www.wattpad.com/user/IceQueenofMitera |
10-18-2007, 11:04 PM | #4 |
Fenway Ranger, Lord of Red Sox Nation
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Thanks! Episode 2 is up, I should be getting one up each week.
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Adventure...betrayal...heroism... Atharon: where heroes are born. My wife once said to me—when I'd been writing for ten or fifteen years—that I could always go back to being a nuclear engineer. And I said to her, 'Harriet, would you let someone who quit his job to go write fantasy anywhere near your nuclear reactor? I wouldn't!' (Robert Jordan) |
10-19-2007, 12:25 PM | #5 |
Halfelven Daughter of the Dunedain, President of Entmoot
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And it looks like America is going to hell in a hand basket I like how you jump from person to person, kinda telling enough of their story to grab your attention. Nice
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"Acaly und Hektor fur Presidants fur EntMut fur life!"~ inked Don't meddle in the affairs of Dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup. "Don't be such a sour wolf" Stiles ~ Heart Monitor http://www.wattpad.com/user/IceQueenofMitera |
10-21-2007, 08:13 PM | #6 |
Fenway Ranger, Lord of Red Sox Nation
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America is indeed in a bit of...insecurity. Always fun. Just you wait...
And I really do like doing the different viewpoints, it's kinda like a TV show in a way. It's fun. And it gets good next episode...
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Adventure...betrayal...heroism... Atharon: where heroes are born. My wife once said to me—when I'd been writing for ten or fifteen years—that I could always go back to being a nuclear engineer. And I said to her, 'Harriet, would you let someone who quit his job to go write fantasy anywhere near your nuclear reactor? I wouldn't!' (Robert Jordan) |
12-01-2007, 01:33 PM | #7 |
Fenway Ranger, Lord of Red Sox Nation
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College be letting up a little on the workload, so there's Episode 6, in the story thread!
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Adventure...betrayal...heroism... Atharon: where heroes are born. My wife once said to me—when I'd been writing for ten or fifteen years—that I could always go back to being a nuclear engineer. And I said to her, 'Harriet, would you let someone who quit his job to go write fantasy anywhere near your nuclear reactor? I wouldn't!' (Robert Jordan) |
12-03-2007, 02:29 PM | #8 |
Halfelven Daughter of the Dunedain, President of Entmoot
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Wow! There's cathloc priests still around in this world? nice surprise. What's with Troy? And who is the E-mail from?
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"Acaly und Hektor fur Presidants fur EntMut fur life!"~ inked Don't meddle in the affairs of Dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup. "Don't be such a sour wolf" Stiles ~ Heart Monitor http://www.wattpad.com/user/IceQueenofMitera |
12-03-2007, 09:39 PM | #9 |
Fenway Ranger, Lord of Red Sox Nation
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Yes, a nice surprise. Just one that kinda occurred to me. The way characters were coming along, it just seemed to make sense. And as for your next two questions...well, that's to be answered...in the future.
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Adventure...betrayal...heroism... Atharon: where heroes are born. My wife once said to me—when I'd been writing for ten or fifteen years—that I could always go back to being a nuclear engineer. And I said to her, 'Harriet, would you let someone who quit his job to go write fantasy anywhere near your nuclear reactor? I wouldn't!' (Robert Jordan) |
12-04-2007, 02:17 PM | #10 |
Halfelven Daughter of the Dunedain, President of Entmoot
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You better answer them or I'm gonna hunt you down
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"Acaly und Hektor fur Presidants fur EntMut fur life!"~ inked Don't meddle in the affairs of Dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup. "Don't be such a sour wolf" Stiles ~ Heart Monitor http://www.wattpad.com/user/IceQueenofMitera |
12-06-2007, 04:18 PM | #11 |
Elven Warrior
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Wow ,that was great. Keep up the good work
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The axes hewed Forlong as he fought alone and unhorsed; and both Duilin of Morthond and his brother were trampled to death when they assailed the mumakil,leading their bowmen close to shoot at the eyes of the monsters. Neither Hirluin the fair would return to Pinnath Gelin, nor Grimbold to Grimslade, nor Halbarad to the northlands,dour-handed Ranger. Those that would not return home, page830-831, The Battle of the Pelennor Fields, The Return of the King |
02-03-2008, 05:02 AM | #12 |
Fenway Ranger, Lord of Red Sox Nation
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Finally, here's the next episode, number 7! And some things happen...
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Adventure...betrayal...heroism... Atharon: where heroes are born. My wife once said to me—when I'd been writing for ten or fifteen years—that I could always go back to being a nuclear engineer. And I said to her, 'Harriet, would you let someone who quit his job to go write fantasy anywhere near your nuclear reactor? I wouldn't!' (Robert Jordan) |
02-07-2008, 09:25 PM | #13 |
Halfelven Daughter of the Dunedain, President of Entmoot
Join Date: Jul 2005
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That was whoa!
Who got shot? And who shot Troy? Gah! More questions! I love it
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"Acaly und Hektor fur Presidants fur EntMut fur life!"~ inked Don't meddle in the affairs of Dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup. "Don't be such a sour wolf" Stiles ~ Heart Monitor http://www.wattpad.com/user/IceQueenofMitera |
02-10-2008, 10:02 AM | #14 |
Elven Warrior
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Wow, Write some more, put it on Entmoot, keep everybody happy
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The axes hewed Forlong as he fought alone and unhorsed; and both Duilin of Morthond and his brother were trampled to death when they assailed the mumakil,leading their bowmen close to shoot at the eyes of the monsters. Neither Hirluin the fair would return to Pinnath Gelin, nor Grimbold to Grimslade, nor Halbarad to the northlands,dour-handed Ranger. Those that would not return home, page830-831, The Battle of the Pelennor Fields, The Return of the King |
02-10-2008, 05:25 PM | #15 |
Fenway Ranger, Lord of Red Sox Nation
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Haha, I'm working on it. College takes up a bit of my time.
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Adventure...betrayal...heroism... Atharon: where heroes are born. My wife once said to me—when I'd been writing for ten or fifteen years—that I could always go back to being a nuclear engineer. And I said to her, 'Harriet, would you let someone who quit his job to go write fantasy anywhere near your nuclear reactor? I wouldn't!' (Robert Jordan) |
03-18-2008, 12:29 AM | #16 |
Fenway Ranger, Lord of Red Sox Nation
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Hey, guess who's got Episode 8 up?
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Adventure...betrayal...heroism... Atharon: where heroes are born. My wife once said to me—when I'd been writing for ten or fifteen years—that I could always go back to being a nuclear engineer. And I said to her, 'Harriet, would you let someone who quit his job to go write fantasy anywhere near your nuclear reactor? I wouldn't!' (Robert Jordan) |
03-19-2008, 09:05 PM | #17 |
Halfelven Daughter of the Dunedain, President of Entmoot
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Nice. Very nice. keep it up
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"Acaly und Hektor fur Presidants fur EntMut fur life!"~ inked Don't meddle in the affairs of Dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup. "Don't be such a sour wolf" Stiles ~ Heart Monitor http://www.wattpad.com/user/IceQueenofMitera |
05-01-2008, 04:08 PM | #18 |
Fenway Ranger, Lord of Red Sox Nation
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There we go, Episode 9!
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Adventure...betrayal...heroism... Atharon: where heroes are born. My wife once said to me—when I'd been writing for ten or fifteen years—that I could always go back to being a nuclear engineer. And I said to her, 'Harriet, would you let someone who quit his job to go write fantasy anywhere near your nuclear reactor? I wouldn't!' (Robert Jordan) |
05-01-2008, 07:06 PM | #19 |
Deus Ex Machina
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The jumping from character to character does remind me of 'Heroes' which isn't a bad thing, but such a fragmented format makes it a little difficult for the reader to orient themself and stay focused on the story, and it makes it unclear what the actual story is...
If you plan to do more with these, I might suggest experimenting with revising them as a scripts for a T.V series or a graphic novel because your style would probably lend itself well to being paired with a visual component.
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"5. Plain Rings with RUNES on the inside. Avoid these like the PLAGUE.-Diana Wynne Jones Tough Guide To FantasyLand ...it's not much of a show if somebody doesn't suffer, and preferably at length. Suffering is beautiful in any case, and so is anguish; but as for loathing, and bitterness... I don't think they belong on the stage at all. - Isabella, I Gelosi |
05-01-2008, 10:48 PM | #20 |
Fenway Ranger, Lord of Red Sox Nation
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Ay, thanks for the comment.
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Adventure...betrayal...heroism... Atharon: where heroes are born. My wife once said to me—when I'd been writing for ten or fifteen years—that I could always go back to being a nuclear engineer. And I said to her, 'Harriet, would you let someone who quit his job to go write fantasy anywhere near your nuclear reactor? I wouldn't!' (Robert Jordan) |
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